Sharonie's Space

No memory book

2011-12-15T08:05:00.000-08:00

I do not have time to fill out a memory book for the twins,but at least wanted to jot down somethings to remember:

At 7 months -
* Both babes army crawl
* Reid holds his bottle.
* Sleep at 7 bedtime...bottle at 10pm and then awake at 7:30am
* Reid again more of a sleeper than Tatum
* Reid has 2.5 teeth already
* Reid can crawl over the stair in the kitchen and also pull himself up onto a couch, or over a person.
* Tatum stil loves her bottle!!!!

Trending Now

2011-09-06T04:29:00.000-07:00

Blake
*in preschool Tuesday/Thursday 8:30-11:30
*wearing underwear to bed and naps
*loving to play with his sister and brother
*into asking me who is married to who and if he can marry me or Tatum
*wiggles
*going to mimi and pop pops and spending the night
*not a fan of playing outside
*loves movies (watching them and carrying them around)
*not into trying to put his shoes on or learning to ride a bike
*likes doing homework sheets with moms (letters, coloring, drawing)
*putting on concerts for us
*asking daddy every morning if he is going to work today
*reading books with mommy in bed before bedtime
*Bear
*eating peanut butter and jelly (no crust, open faced, eat jelly off first by using his fingers to pick it off. then eating the peanut butter and bread)
*granola bars and fishy crackers are his favorite snacks.
*making cookies with mommy
*making Santa a list

Tatum
*Rolls over (before she was three months old)
*enjoys sleeping on her back
*loves/needs paci
*talks in her crib at three in the morning
*out eats Reid most of the time
*smiles and coos a lot
*loves to stand with help
*looks for Reid
*Entertained by Blake
*gearing up for her "crown"
*was just dedicated two days ago with Reid

Reid
*loves to laugh
*laughs easily
*very chill baby
*falls asleep easily
*loves to hold Tatums hand when close to her
*burps easily after a feeding
*rolls over (shortly after tatum did)
*smiles at everyone
*enjoys chewing on his shirts (sleeves or the top of his shirts)
*spits up more often than tatum
*prefers being on back vs. tummy

Aint gonna lie

2011-08-28T08:34:00.001-07:00

Having twins is not easy. It's very straining on every area of my life. I have come to realize that there will not be a day that goes as planned, there will not be a day that goes smoothly, and there will not be a relaxing day for awhile.

My heart hurts for Blake and I hope he doesn't feel the everyday stress I feel. I want to hear him laugh, smile, see him run around and enjoy being home with mommy and the babies. I try to spend time with him and play with him, but my energy is spent so much on the twins.

I wish there was a shot that I could give myself to give me two extra arms and two extra hands.

Now that the twins are older it's actually harder. They fuss more, they are awake more, they just plain old need more! I am trying to learn how to manage all of this, but am afraid I am failing daily.

I was once told by another mom of multiples that you will look back a these years with the twins and a toddler and think that you did all you could to just survive. I can totally see that to be true right now.

Not into blogging but....

2011-06-15T05:15:00.000-07:00

To blog takes so much energy out of me right now. I feel like I need reserve every ounce I have for the children. However, today is a special day where I need to blog.

Today is my dad's 56th birthday. I am so grateful that God hand picked him to be my father for the past 31 1/2 years. My dad has always done so much for his family. I can think of millions of things he has done for me, his second eldest daughter. Something he did for me that has had a lasting impact was when I had my miscarriage a year ago. I called Bethany balling and couldn't breath I was crying so hard. Jason was unable to get home quickly, so Bethany called my dad. Within minutes he knocked on my door. When I opened it for him to come in, he just held me and said, "Honey,I don't understand but I know that He gives and takes away" His simple jester of a hug and simple statement of encouragement brought such peace. I will never forget my dad staying with me that day til someone could come and take care of me. He just sat on the floor with Blake and played with him and was such a calming presence that day.

I love remembering the last day I was teaching before I had Blake. There was a knock on my classroom door. I opened it up and there was my dad standing at the door with flowers and he says, " I thought your last day of teaching would be hard for you so I brought you some flowers to brighten your day" He was so thoughtful and encouraging once again.

Honestly, I could go on and on about how my dad has been such an influential man in my life and constantly gave to me in many ways. On his birthday today I pray his gift would be peace and hope during this time. That somehow the Holy Spirit would give him a hope that he can and will make it through this hard trial. Praying he can tangibly feel God's presence in his room!!!! Happy Birthday to an amazing father!

Still waiting

2011-06-04T05:03:00.001-07:00

Dad is still sick and has been at Northwestern for ten days now....several of those spent in ICU to regulate his blood pressure. This is has been going on now for two months not knowing "exactly" what dad has. Dr goes back and forth glioma not glioma. Poor dad has been pricked and poked so many times with ct scans and blood tests up the wazoo. I am getting very anxious and weary in waiting for them to find a definite diagnosis and then a plan of action in how to make him better. In talking to someone yesterday, I realize that God knows....he knows exactly what my dad has and the exact remedy to make him better. I have been having a hard time that in an instant God can reveal to the dr what has been giving my dad trouble the past two months, yet God has not chosen to do so. God can also, like in the Bible heal someone in just a snap of a finger, yet he hasn't chosen to do so. I have to in what I have been raised to know and what I have also been seen to be true in my own life, trust beyond my understanding. That right now is the biggest battle I am facing. I do know, like in the past, the Lord will not let me down. Whatever the outcome may be, he has during this trial shown us blessings along this hard journey.

This isn't the reason I came in

2011-05-01T18:36:00.001-07:00

Wednesday night April 13, 2011 I went downstairs because I was feeling sick to my stomach. I told Jason I felt like I was going to throw up and decided to eat some pretzels to settle my tummy. I went to bed and later that night I was up every hour or so using the potty. I felt so weak and achy and felt like I had the flu. I woke Jason up at around five and asked if he could take off work so that I could rest. I honestly didn't feel like I could take care of Blake the rest of the day. I also decided at five that morning to call the OB. I wanted to know at what point should I be worried that I am not keeping anything in my stomach. The OB said that I should go to labor and delivery and be treated for dehydration. I decided that I would take a warm shower and drink some water. If after drinking the water I got sick of any sorts I would go to the hospital. Sure enough an hour after drinking the water, I threw up six times in a row. I showered again, and layed on the couch. At seven that morning I called Richie to see if he could stay with Blake while I went to the hospital. I already had a sitter that day for a dr. appointment so I knew Rich wouldn't have to stay with Blake long.

Jason went to a mandatory meeting he had for his new job and I checked myself into labor and delivery. I brought a couple books with me to read and was ready to have an IV put in me for fluids.

When I checked in to LD, the nurses were so nice. They took great care of me. They didn't give me fluids right away, but they did hook me up to a monitor to keep track of babies heart rates and my contractions.

I felt more contractions and I felt them lasting longer. The nurses did an internal and realized I was 30% effaced and 1.5 cm dilated. When I heard that I cried. I had never been dilated or effaced before and so I got scared. Before I knew it, I had auntie and grandma b with me in the hospital. Bethany called them because she didn't want me at the hospital by myself. All along, we all thought I was going to be treated for dehydration and was going to be let go.

I had originally had that day an appointment with maternal fetal medicine. So I kept that appointment at the hospital. They wheeled me into my ultrasound on the hospital bed (by this time I had IVs) and they looked at an ultrasound of the babies. I really thought that since a month ago the babies weighed 4 pounds each about that by now a month later they would be almost six pounds. As the tech was looking at the pic of babies I asked, how are they looking. She said their weights were four pounds two ounces and four pounds twelve ounces. I was shocked! I was so worried, in a month it didn't seem they grew very much. I asked her then if I was showing that the babies were measuring 36 weeks since I was 36 wks and 2 days. Her response was I'll let the dr. talk to you. Of course my mind went to all the bad places and it felt like forever before the dr. came into talk to us. With my grandma and aunt sitting with me, the dr began to tell me that he thinks the babies will do better if they were out of me vs. staying in. He said with me having contractions and based on their growth it would be best to take the babies. I looked at him and asked how likely is it that I would go home tonight, he said you prob won't be going home. It broke my heart that I didn't get to give Blake a hug and kiss goodbye before I was about to have these babies.

It didn't really register that I was having these little ones. It took my aunt and grandma being very blunt with me saying, "Sharon you are having your babies in a few hours" I didn't believe it! I came to the hospital because I was dehydrated, not because I was going to have the twins.
The dr. proceeded to tell me that I should be prepared for them to spend some time in the NICU. The babies would be there because they would need to learn how to feed and gain some weight. I should expect the twins to be some of the biggest babies in there, and that they wouldn't have to be there for long.
I began to ask the dr. tons of questions: how many people allowed in the NICU...how often can I go up there....what are the hours that it's opened..exc. I had to prepare myself that they were not going to be able to be held by family or us right after birth. My goal all along in my pregnancy was to deliver after 36 weeks and for all of us to go home together without spending time in NICU.

After the dr. told me I was going to have the babies in a few hours and to expect them to be in NICU a rush of emotion came over me. I wanted Jason at the hospital and I wanted to kiss and hold Blake.

I couldn't have those to right away, but my grandma, aunt, and nurses were so comforting as I began to process I was going to soon be a mother of three before the night ended.

As I was wheeled back into LD room, soon my mom came to see me and I got a hold of Jason. The nurses were preparing me for deliver of the babies at 2;30 that afternoon and Jason got to the hospital around 1:30 or so. Richie and Auntie Re' stayed with Blake while Jason came and sat with me. Auntie Denise went back home and grandma and mom waited in the waiting room for the rest of the family to arrive.

I began to get questioned and introduced to those who would be in the delivery room with me for my csection. I found out the dr. delivering the babies was my least favorite dr. I began to get very sad when I heard it was him that was going to deliver the babies. I was excited though that the nurses that would be in the delivery room were ones I was comfortable with. I knew one nurse from maternal fetal medicine, and another nurse decided to stay longer after her shift to be in the room with me for my c-section.

Continue Part 2 later!

36 weeks

2011-04-12T12:50:00.000-07:00

Today I went to my OB appointment in which I just have one more left before the little ones arrive. I measured 45 weeks along and tomorrow they will confirm my c-section date. I had a crazy dream....really the only pregnancy related dream my whole pregnancy thus far. I had a dream that I had my c-section, but only one baby was taken out...Reid. The sewed me back up, sent me back home to recover. As I was recovering at home I felt some kicks and realized Tatum was still in my belly. We had to go back to CDH and they had to do another c-section to take Tatum out...wonder what this dream means. Interpret for me someone!

I know my family is so anxious to meet these little ones. I know they are looking to them to bring some joy and happiness to such a hard time in our lives. I am praying that these two will be easy babies....healthy....sleep through the night...eat well...play well..poop well...and not be stressful!

Enjoyable

2011-04-10T19:18:00.000-07:00

I can't lie, the first day that my dad was brought home from the hospital it was very hard. It was hard to see him with a walker and hard to see what my family's new reality is going to be.

There has been some stressful times, but tonight was such a blessing. I was able to sit at the table and on the couch and just visit with my family. Laughing about old times, talking about sports, and just being in one another's presence was awesome! I love these moments. For a second I felt like my dad wasn't sick and we were back to what life should be like.

Lately, I feel and have prayed that I know God can heal my dad, I just hope he chooses to.

Doesn't seem real

2011-04-08T11:29:00.000-07:00

Life doesn't seem to be real right now....in fact I wish it wasn't. I wish what is unfolding in front of me was just a movie or nightmare. Unfortunately though it's not. I debated about journaling of my dad's battle with cancer, but feel as though it will be good for me to get what I am feeling out in the open.

I hate to add this phrase to my vocabulary, "my dad has cancer" It doesn't seem real, it shouldn't be happening to my family.

However every time I walk into that hospital room and see my dad laying there, it's reality that he is battling inoperable cancer. This week has been very hard and one that I never wanted to walk through.

Although it's been hard, the Lord has chosen to at moments come close and reassure me of his presence.

It's amazing to me that amidst all that my father has going on with his illness, he is the one cracking jokes and making everyone else laugh in the room. He is smiling and is always talking about us kids and our mom. He has never ever been about himself.

As I think about the road that is ahead of us and the changes that will occur, it's very hard to process.

I have had the privilege to live close to my family and be able to go there once aweek with Blake. Pop Pop would always watch TV with Blake in his chair and eat Cheez Its. It was their thing they did together. Then everytime we would leave, my dad would put Blake in the car and run with the car as I drove away....Blake would get the biggest laugh out of it. Sitting with them in Saturday night church was awesome. I always feel so blessed to sit side by side with my family in the church I grew up in. Blake would always want pop pop to hold him and then pick him up from class. I know these are little tings, but some of them are going to change.

I try to think of blessings through all of this and I can think that at least my dad will be able to finally rest. He has always worked hard labor jobs for money and just to volunteer. It's his turn to rest and for others to serve him. I am glad that in two weeks he will be able to hold his new grandson and granddaughter. It will be something very special for him and for me.

My dad has been my rock (first one at my door when my miscarriage happened), such a servant, sensitive to my needs, and very giving, eager to do any odd stuff around my house. I am anxious to see how God in return is that to Him and now as an adult I can be that to him as well.

Today let the fight begin

2011-04-06T20:38:00.000-07:00

We were informed that my dad has a malignant tumor on his brain stem. We will find out tomorrow if there is more cancer anywhere else in his body. This is crazy to be going through right now, and I can't go into detail about how things unfolded because I just am in shock still. My dad is a fighter, has always been a hard worker, and with God on his side right now...together they will fight to beat this!

The Waiting Room

2011-04-06T12:14:00.001-07:00

My dad has been in the hospital for several days now. I have gone to see him twice a day and have been able to spend some time with him.

Last night, we were all in the waiting room waiting for him to get out of the MRI. I looked around and it was everyone that I love dearly and are a huge support system to me.

I noticed though that I didn't have my support there that I have had my whole life. The strong callused hands to put around me, laugh with me, tell jokes with me. He wasn't there...in fact we were all there to support and wait for him...my dad.

I had a hard time being in that waiting room knowing he was helpless in a hospital bed going through what he is going through.

I went home last night and couldn't sleep. I put on Hillsongs preaching and listened to a guy talk about be overcomers in our thoughts. I was very encouraged and began to pray and worship for a few min. I felt a peace surround me during this time.

After those encouraging moments I went upstairs to shower and just began to pray more and become frustrated that we had to wait for results of MRI. I hate the waiting process, and was quickly brought back to the thought of being alone in the waiting room at the hospital wishing for my dad to have been there to encourage and lighten up the situation.

God soon spoke to me and said, "You are in the waiting room and I am with you...I am your heavenly father waiting with you and holding you."

I so needed that word and comfort from the Lord. Friends have been asking what they could pray for and I have simply said peace...peace to surround me. At that moment when God spoke to my heart I had a peace.

After my shower, Jason knew that I was up and took my hand and just prayed with me out loud. Prayed for his family, my family, for our mind to not be influenced by neg thoughts. That was a bonding moment with Jason that I will never forget. I soon fell asleep after that prayer.

These past few days have been very difficult. I hope that they figure out what is wrong with my dad and will make things better for him and our family. This is not easy, but Lord remain close and faithful to my family that we cannot deny that your hand isn't evident.

I am blessed and so grateful for friends and other family members who are so supportive. It is God's hands extended to us!

From Thursday through the weekend...no thanks for a repeat

2011-04-03T15:06:00.000-07:00

I would be okay if I didn't repeat Thursday-Sunday. I think under normal circumstances, meaning if I wasn't carrying two babies at almost 35 weeks and caring for a three year old I wouldn't feel this way. However since I am irritable, uncomfortable, and anything sets me off....I can only handle so much.

Thursday at my 34 week appointment it was a bit difficult. We found out I have some protein coming from me and was slightly dehydrated. Which could be a fluke or could be a sign of preclampsia. When I went in for the non stress test, the babies weren't moving much so I had to have juice and lay there longer. I was so worried cause I have been feeling like they weren't moving and went to Labor and Delivery just a few weeks ago to be monitored for the same thing. Well, after sitting for forty five min...the babies moved and gave a good read for the dr. Only to find out that non of my contractions were monitored because the nurse put the circular reader on me wrong. I felt several stronger contractions and was a bit frustrated they couldn't be read on the monitor. Well I had to be okay with fact that the babies were showing good heart rates despite the protein being found, despite the slight dehydration, and the fact that no contractions could be detect from the monitor being put on wrong.

Shortly after my stress test I went in for an ultrasound and the tech couldn't find any pockets of fluid to test....and she couldn't find the membrane that separates the twins. I thought to myself...really no more scares please. I have been blessed with such great reports that I didn't want to start now with anything to be cautious about. After the tech tried for ten min...she called in the dr. Thankfully he found it as soon as the Doppler was placed on my stomach. Things began to look good and no concerns. I hated the scare but was grateful there were no major concerns as I left the hospital.

On to Friday where I started my twice a day shots. Not too bad, the only problem is making sure I get my shot as close to 12 hours apart as possible. Later that night, we went out to dinner for my grandmas birthday. That was so fun and I lasted about two hours which in my mind is great. The only bad part of that is my dad was suppose to come and couldn't. He had to be taken to the ER because he had been feeling dizzy for several days. I hate it when parents are sick or aren't themselves. I have been blessed at my parents age of mid 50's they haven't had any major health issues...so when I get a call that my dad is in the ER for dizziness, I was immediately worried. Thankfully after scan and blood work they think it's part of a virus, if he's not better in a few days he will have to go back.

On to Saturday. I love my husband and I love his work ethic....he had to work til 3:00 on Saturday so that meant I pretty much had Blake all day like any other work day. I don't mind that as long as I am feeling okay and have energy. However, feeling good and having energy do not go hand in hand the last couple weeks. I am used to Jason taking Blake for two hours on Saturday and Sunday so I can put my feet up and relax, so not having that this past Saturday really wore me out. I then took Blake to my parents to pick up dinner for them and spent about an hour or two there. We had fun just sitting and hanging out. While we were gone, the best part of my weekend was Jason putting together the crib that just came. I love it!

Here we are on Sunday. I didn't get much time to put my feet up today either. Which I am noticing is a need of mine as I end this twin pregnancy. Jason had to seed the yard and go to the mall. So that left me with Blake....he did take him to church with him which was a good break for me. I just hate that while I have Blake lately we watch TV. The other day I did do some crafts with him, but how I would love to be outside with him teaching him how to ride his bike. Anyways...Jason came home from the mall and Blake was just laying down for his nap. We began to watch some of the Cubs game when suddenly we heard a boom. Jason went downstairs and saw that the glass door to our kitchen shattered. It hasn't fallen to pieces yet but is shattered. Jason had to go order a new door. The thing I am more concerned about is it shattering and rain and wind .... nasty weather is suppose to be here tonight and tomorrow morning. I don't want rain in my house nor shattered glass all over the floor.

I think I am done venting. The only repeat I would have of this weekend would be celebrating my grandmas birthday and rejoicing in my baby furniture being delivered and being put together.

I still have a small list of things that need to be done before the babies get here:
1) Camera pictures cleared
2) Video camera cleared
3) Breathable bumpers/sheets put on cribs
4) Area organized for bottles/bibs/formula
5) Pack and play/bassinet/swing/bouncer brought upstairs
6) Baskets made up and ready with diaper/wipes/powder/lotion to be put in the family room so I don't have to go up and down stairs.

and I am sure there is more I am not thinking about.....

I think some of my furstation lies in the fact that we have three weekends left at the most before the babies come. I wanted to enjoy these weekends as a family. We weren't able to enjoy this weekend with fun family time and next Saturday Jason is gone with Blake to go see his parents so we won't have that weekend together. That leaves two weekends and one in which is Easter weekend.

If I could have it my way we would be outside as family, Blake laughing, swinging, playing on the slide and daddy and mommy sitting on the deck furniture enjoying Blake and talking while listening to the Cubs game. I would love to find time to go to the pet store with Blake and choo choo johnny's for lunch as a family.

I think I am just hormonal, drained, stressed, and overwhelmed with thoughts of what's to come.

34 weeks

2011-03-29T13:01:00.000-07:00

I am 34 weeks along today! A month from tomorrow we will for sure be holding our two little babes! I am getting more and more curious how each one is going to look. I am too though getting more and more anxious about all the HUGE changes that are coming our way. I am hoping I will be a laid back flexible mom for the little ones. Today I went to the dr. and measured 40 weeks along. I shared with the OB that I am more and more having contractions. She said at this point if the twins are born there most likely would not be any major health issues. And for someone tiny as I am to be carrying twins, I am due for frequent contractions.

So here on out little ones, you can come! We are almost ALL ready. We still need our crib and dresser to come, but we have everything else we need for your arrivals.

Blake has been so kissy and loving towards me lately. I talk about Reid and Tatum alot and he is so excited to meet them. He probably is feeling like very soon life is going to change for him. He gives me random hugs and kisses and I just LOVE it!

32 weeks and more

2011-03-20T08:01:00.000-07:00

I went to my dr and the hospital. I go to the dr every week and also the hospital so I am constantly being watched and checked which I love!

Tatum is 4 pounds 2oz and Reid is 4 pounds. I have had several braxton hicks contractions. They did a stress test and saw the contractions and will keep an eye on it, but nothing to worry about. The dr. said this is my new norm. The fluid on the babies look great as well. I am not dilated or effaced at all. Things are going well.

I am very uncomfortable and live for the weekends when daddy is home. He takes Blake out so mommy can have her feet up, he plays with him, gives him lunch, and I contribute the reason I have done so well so far in the pregnancy to not only prayers but my husband doing and helping so much!

I have a gut feeling I won't be going 38 weeks, but we'll see!

10:15

2011-03-10T11:56:00.000-08:00

At around 10:15 this morning, I got a phone call from the dr. office. They called to tell me that they are going to schedule my date for my c-section. I cried when she told me the date, I just couldn't believe this is all going to happen so fast. I am getting nervous and excited! We are about 6.5 weeks away, they have it scheduled for April 27th. I think honestly, that I won't make it that long. I just can't see myself going that late! The days are getting harder and harder to go through. I am getting bigger and very irritable. I am averaging about four hours of sleep at night and have not had much of an appetite either. I eat about one big meal a day and snack the rest of the time. I don't crave much, but I did tell Jason there are a couple of things I want to eat before the babies come:
1) Jimmy Johns vito sub ( I did today)
2) Choc shake (I did on Tuesday from Ober.)
3) Strawberry shortcake or cheesecake...both would do :)
4) Portillos roast beef
5) Stuffed pizza

I have eaten 2 of the 5...that gives me 6.5 more weeks left to do the other 3.

Blakers

2011-03-05T11:38:00.000-08:00

Blake will be three in about three weeks. He is something else that little man. I adore him to pieces and miss him still when he sleeps....but don't get me wrong it's a nice time for me to relax too.

Lately, Blake is very much into playing store. He will get his shopping cart, filled it up with LOTS of toys, and scan his toys with his cash register. He then takes out his wallet to pay for all his things. We played store together for about a half hour the other day! It was so fun!

Blake can count to 15, knows his ABC, and is now learning his letters. HE knows letters B, A, W, X, Y, S, R, and O. I slowly add new letters every couple weeks. He loves to idenitfy the letters he knows on signs while we are driving or while we are reading. He knows his shapes: circle, square, triangle, rectangle, oval, heart, star, and octagon. He has known his main colors for awhile now. He is so much fun to be around.

He still loves to tackle and can really throw and hit a ball. Jason will throw a ball and Blake will hit it without a tee. He honestly impresses me!

Blake recently has been into treating bear like a human and baby. He likes to give bear food from our cabinet, water, medicine, exc. Bear gets his diaper changed, his teeth brushed, and gets wrapped up in a towel which is his baby blanket.

As far as bed time goes and potty training...well...potty training is going well for number one...number two we still struggle with. I hope he grasps both of those before too long. In Sept. Blake will go to preschool two days a week and he has to be fully potty trained in order to get in!

Bedtime is about 8:30 or so. He has been recently talking about how mommy and daddy won't leave him. I am not sure why he is talking about it or worried about it. But Jason and I reassure him all the time that we will never leave him. When we leave his room after praying and telling stories, Blake will say, "I love you so much. I love you lots" Ugh melts my heart...then he gives us a big squeeze for a hug and a kiss. He often asks for three or four of those before we leave the room, and unfortunately I have to put an end to it or he would never let me leave.

He sleeps with his Bear, animals (five of them) and always his movies. He has this thing for movies...he has to carry them around the house, have them in bed, have them in the car....he just loves his movies. Of course we just let him have the case and not the CD.

As I type out all these things that Blake is doing and into right now, it makes me amazed at how much he has grown up, he thinks he reads words now, he loves to sing in a microphone, loves to dance, he is quite the character. It's hard for me to imagine in just 7 weeks he will not be the only child, but will move into the big brother role.

I love BLakers and am so grateful I got three years of just him all to myself!

29 week appointment

2011-02-25T05:41:00.000-08:00

At 29 weeks I measure 37 and gained 3 pounds in a week. I have some new friends on my tummy as of two weeks ago :( I didn't have those with Blake so it's something new for me and I think they will be with me for my whole life.

Everything looked good at dr. office. I go next week to the hospital for an ultrasound to check on the fluid of Tatum. It's low so they want to keep an eye on it to make sure she is continuing to grow. If it's too low they will have to take the babies early. I am hoping to go at least 34 weeks. 36 weeks would be wonderful...so next week is a big week for us!

We finally ordered the crib, dresser, carseat, and double stroller. We are organizing this weekend and washing Blake's baby clothes that Reid will wear. It's crazy pulling out some of Blake's old things. Makes me sad, but so excited we get to use them again.

Lot of baby stuff has come in the mail that we ordered on line this week. Crib sheet, baby bajorn carrier, bath wipes, exc. Getting closer!!!

Little ones here is my growing list

2011-02-24T04:47:00.000-08:00

With you two arriving just about 8 weeks away, here is my list of things I want to accomplish...the first one was accomplished yesterday and the second one will be accomplished today:

1) Buy crib/dresser
2) Buy double stroller/car seat
3) Buy a car
4) Buy organization bins
5) Buy a desk
6) Organize toys downstairs and upstairs
7) Organize cabinet in kitchen to fit formula and bottles
8) Organize coat closet
9) Get out all baby stuff and wash (ie. bassinet, pack play, toys, bouncy)
10) Was all of Rieds baby clothes
11) Meet with Pediatrician

I think that's about it for now...I am sure as time gets closer the list will continue to grow!

We want to make your arrival as smooth as possible...I am still so curious if you will go eight more weeks or come a tad early. I am so grateful that there are no for seen problems so far!!!

A fun memorable time for us

2011-02-22T05:56:00.000-08:00

Yesterday my hardworking husband found out he got a bit of a promotion. It will require a job title change, office change, and territory change. I am so proud of how he works his tail off to provide and further his career.

I decided to celebrate his hard work I would make him his favorite homemade apple pie from scratch. All day I was telling Blake we are so proud of daddy, he got a new job.

It came time for daddy to come home from work and we couldn't wait to congratulate him. We waited in the kitchen to hear the garage door open so we could hold the pie and give him congrats hugs and kisses. I kept prepping Blake..."we are going to say congrats daddy we are so proud of you." While we were sitting waiting for daddy, Blake came up with a great idea. He went around the house collecting presents for daddy. He grabbed a birthday bag and started putting his blanket in there, powder, movies, and my Valentines day card in there. When he was all done, he was jumping up and down getting so excited for daddy to open his presents.

As the garage door opened, Blake ran to the door and said surprise...I said congrats we are proud of you. Gave him his homemade apple pie, and Blake jumped up and down giving him his presents. Daddy barely walked in the door and opened his gifts....he acted so happy and grateful. I should have taken a picture of Blake's face as he waited in excitement for each thing he pulled out of the birthday bag. Daddy gloated about each gift and said, "I can have all these" And Blake replied, "It's for you daddy" Daddy said, "Blake why don't you have your movie, you like sleeping with that" Blake said, " No daddy, it's for you" Well shortly after Blake responds...yes, daddy I want my movie.

What a memorable fun time for our family, Jason's hard work is paid off and seeing how excited Blake was!

Board Game

2011-02-21T14:24:00.000-08:00

Blake got two board games for his birthday. I decided he can attempt to play them now that he will be three in about a month. We sat down on the family room floor today and played our first one:Candy Land. He did pretty good. He understood to move spaces according to the color you drew. He did great at taking turns, and even did good when he noticed I was beating him. Tomorrow we may bust out Chutes and Ladders.

Today I also signed him up for a buddy and me class at the hospital. It will be a tour of where I will be and a nursery of the babies. It should be fun!

Also, potty training is going pretty good except for number two. We have tried so hard to accomplish it. He does fine if we put him on the potty when we see him trying to go, but he doesn't take the initiative and go himself like he does when he has to do number 1. We are still working on it and will continue to do so until he is successful!

Preparing

2011-02-19T11:40:00.000-08:00

Okay, I am almost 29 weeks along and today I really began to prepare for your arrival. Daddy and I went shopping last night for your crib and finally decided on one we loved! Wouldn't you know when we finally decide on one, it's out of stock~grrrrrr. Anyways today daddy and Blake went to see Gigi and Paw Paw to celebrate Blake's 3rd birthday. Because how far along I am, I was unable to go along. I am sad to miss out on such exciting times with Blake.

Instead, mom stayed home and Auntie J came over. We made five meals to freeze for when you are born. After we made meals, I did some laundry to start getting cleaned all your clothes that we bought. I have a long way to go, but I have to start somewhere.

On Saturday, Sam is coming over to watch Blake for four hours so mommy and daddy can organize and get more stuff ready for you guys. That was a gift from Mimi and Pop Pop for Christmas, they always are thinking practical!

Off I go to get more stuff done!!!

Pictures at 28 weeks: Mom cooking meals for when you two come.......one of mommy's best friends visited......you and daddy on Valentine's day.....and a picture of the outfits you will come home in.

Little babes

2011-02-17T14:41:00.001-08:00

Went for my 28 week growth ultrasound. Reid weighed 2 pounds 9 oz and Tatum weighed 2 pounds 4 oz. They look healthy so far. As the dr was leaving the room, he said "congrats, you are doing good and no pre term labor anytime soon" That means in ten weeks the little boy and girl should be here! Still floors me we are having twins! Not sure when it will sink in, but I just am in awe that we will be coming home with two babies!

My belly button has begun to pop out, and I am feeling more and more like I am reliving the first trimester as far as fatigue goes. I still never felt the discomfort I feel now when I was pregnant with Blake. It's still hard to adjust to the fact I can't clean as much or bend as much as I used to. But soon enough after the little ones are born I will be back to doing all the things I loved and don't love doing!

Venting

2011-02-08T06:20:00.000-08:00

It's been a hard couple weeks here. Jason and Blake have been sick. That means that I can't go and be out and about like I enjoy being and we are stuck inside! Everyday Blake will ask me, "mommy we go bye bye today" With his thick green runny nose we are inside all day! He has also been waking up at 6:30 and every night he is up two times in the middle of the night. That makes for not a happy camper toddler during the day.

On top of it, I am just HUGE and am so uncomfortable. I am uncomfortable to stand, sit, bend, so that leaves me to laying down all the time. I am not up to cleaning, I am not up to cooking, or baking anymore. I try to reserve my energy to handle Blake and that's about it.

Jason has been sick for a month now. He keeps fighting a cold. By the time he gets home, Blake is ready to wrestle and play tackle and we can't exactly do that with Jason feeling sick for so long.

It's just frustrating honestly. I can't do what I normally could do...vacuum, wash out the big soaker tub, lift heavy things.....I have to wait on Jason to do all that and it's very maddening. I could get it all done in one day, yet I can't do it. And the most frustrating thing is I really wanted to enjoy our time as a family of three doing fun things together and with how sick everyone has been and how exhausted I get, we haven't done ANYTHING!

I don't want to look back on these last few months with only Blake as a regret. I hope Blake and Jason are on the mend and we can have all of March and part of April to enjoy before the little ones arrive.

White out

2011-02-02T05:11:00.001-08:00

Blake, you will never know or remember all the snow we are getting right now! It's amazing to me and something that I have never seen in my 31 years alive. The snow is up to our deck and is just a white blanket outside. The winds were amazing up to 60mph. We even had something called thunder snow.....lighting and thunder in the middle of a snowstorm. The streets were so empty and everything is closed! Even daddy was told to not come to work and would reevaluate later this morning.

We had a great time in what they called the "Blizzard of 2011" Daddy came home early from work, we had an early dinner, made cookies, had a fire, and watched movies with you. It made you so happy, you had so much fun!

Just what I needed

2011-02-01T12:34:00.001-08:00

Deauternonmy 32:4
He is the rock, His works are perfect and all his ways just. A faithful God who does no wrong!!

25 week appointment

2011-01-27T18:52:00.001-08:00

I am 25 weeks and measure 31....in addition I lost a pound. Next time I go to the dr. I do the glucose test.

I know one thing...Tatum is a mover...Reid is laid back! Anxious to see if that continues outside the womb.

Also, we had our brother in law come in and do some built ins for our closet. Oh my does it look awesome! Jason and I can now fit both of our clothes in the same closet. I organized Blake's, babies, and my closet after he left and am paying for it now! Wiped out and back pain...I gosta take it easy and somehow know when to stop.

Next on our agenda is get all the baby stuff out and have it cleaned and washed. Soon and very soon they will be here.

Reading a parenting book

2011-01-25T18:16:00.000-08:00

So I am reading a parenting book called " Have a New Kid by Friday"

I was reading the workbook that goes along with the book and loved what it said.

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

Train = Training is different from teaching. Training suggests an ongoing process, practicing something over and over until you've got it down pat, and it has become a part of you. You keep at it.

Up = Too many parents train their children down instead of up. They speak for them, think for them, make decisions for them, fight their battles for them, and in so doing, they disable them. The scripture says train "up" a child. In other words, encourage that daughter to think for themselves, encourage that son to make good decisions and choices, and move along toward independence.

Child = Don't wait until your kids are adolescents or young adults. You've got to start the training early.

In the way = There are lots of ways a child can go these days, the choices are out there. What ever path the child chooses in life, it should be in harmony with God's path. As parents, we must acknowledge different possible paths for each child and train them accordingly.

He or she should go = This implies that we should discern the individuality and special "bent" that God has given each child. Parents should help each child develop his or her special abilities. Teachers, adult friends and grandparents can be a big help in that process.

And when he/she is old, he will not depart from it = It's much easier for kids to stay on the right path when they have been led to make right choices for themselves. Does that mean they will never foul up? No. But the guiding principle of Scripture is train them up right, and they will turn out right.

The word discipline suggests teaching and learning, not punishment and harsh consequences. Your home is a safe place for kids to get second chances and to foul up and make mistakes. No better place and no better people to make mistakes then your child's own home and parents.....a place where he is loved, accepted, and nurtured in.

24 weeks

2011-01-24T13:12:00.001-08:00

I went to the hospital last week for a growth ultrasound. They measure the legs, arms, heart, head, weight, and see how the babies are developing. Once again, we walked away with a wonderful report. Tatum was 1 lb 7 oz and Reid was 1 lb 11 oz. So they are doing great. I go back in a month to recheck their growth!

Jason and I have started to redo closets. My bro in law comes this week to install new organizers. All we had before was one rail for clothes and then a shelf about the clothes. I am looking forward to getting drawers added and a double hang added too.

We went to the baby store (babies R us) and started looking at all the stuff we need for the babies. If I was having only one baby we wouldn't need so much, but because I am having two, we are in need of more bottles, bumbo, high chair, boppy, bibs, onsies, socks, hats, double stroller, crib set, car seat, and car!

Side note: Blake loves the baby store because he loves looking at baby wipes and movies. He loves his wipes!!!

Some items are not big purchase items and some are a huge purchase items. It's crazy all this will be in our home in the next three months along with two new babies.

I am hoping the babies will be healthy and can be taken home when I go home from the hospital.

Jason and I were able to have much needed alone time this past weekend. He wasn't feeling well, but I ran to babies r us, portillos, and then I came home and we rented a movie. It seems very little during the week we have time to talk alone. I am thankful for family that randomly took Blake for the night for us. We have averaged one date night a month. I guess that's more than most couples.....maybe?

I have been craving recces peanut butter cups and anything sweet lately!

One of the reason

2011-01-13T12:05:00.000-08:00

One of the reason's Jesus was brought to Earth was to bring hope and peace. It's nice to know that through my faith in him and the Bible I have access to that hope and peace.

Every night Blake prays

2011-01-11T19:50:00.000-08:00

Jesus pray mommy's belly daddy's belly Amen!

He is so precious! I love him so much.

Not so easy

2011-01-11T13:37:00.000-08:00

Having a hard time parenting Blake the past three weeks. I don't know what has gotten into him, but things just aren't working. I love him to death and it breaks my heart.....I can only hope that things change soon. I pray for wisdom and creativity in how to deal with him and discipline and yet I still struggle.

In the past but need it now

2011-01-06T12:35:00.000-08:00

I have done this in the past, but I feel like I need to do it again....I need to list all the blessings I have been given by God

*Husband that loves the Lord
*Husband that provides
*Husband that works hard
*House over my head
*Two nice cars
*A healthy son
*Furniture to go in our home
*Food every week (more than we need)
*Money to buy clothes
*Money to have haircuts
*Money to go out to dinner
*Friends that are uplifting
*Family that loves, supports, and prays
*Church that is a place where I can be encouraged
*MOPS group
*Playdates
*Money for Blake to take classes
*Opportunity to be a stay at home mom
*Twins
*Encouraging extended family

There are so many more to keep track of, but those were what came off the top of my head in the matter of three min...satan...in your face...I am blessed. No matter what you bring my way this week, coming months, the Lord has already blessed me with so much!!!!

I need to remember this one

2011-01-05T13:17:00.001-08:00

There is no wisdom, no insight, no plan, that can succeed against the Lord. Proverbs 21:30

I have to tell myself when my life is surrendered to the Lord, all that happens is because of his perfect will in my life. Whether it's twins, Jason's job, family health, it's all of God's plan prevailing. Good or bad, happy or sad, I want nothing more than God's plan to be unfolded before me.

I have comfort knowing that there is no plan (mine or Satan's) that can be above the Lord's. When my hearts desire is to be walking the path that God has chosen for me, then his plan will succeed. What peace that brings!!!

Side note: Had 22 week ultrasound today and twins look great. Reid and Tatum are both head down this time and Tatum was actually kicking Reid today. Everything appears to measuring properly...and to quote the dr. "Everything looks great, keep doing what you are doing" Hmmm does that mean I can keep eating like a hog!!!???? I go back in two weeks to have them measure liquid and babies fully again.

To be honest, I am having a hard time

2010-12-31T04:48:00.001-08:00

I am trying to balance between my role as a woman, wife, mom, and friend. I am trying to spend as much time with my friends, one on one time with my husband, one on one time with Blake, and some alone time. I just can't seem to fit it all in and be satisfied. I feel like I am pulled in many directions and can't give a hundred percent to any of those. If I feel pulled now, I can't imagine how pulled I will feel in four months when the twins get here. I know my life and all of me will have to be devoted to the twins and Blake. But there has to be a way in the midst of all of that to not loose who I am as a friend, a daughter/sister, and a wife. I hate to see the other roles go wayside as I fulfill my duty as a mom. I am a bit perplexed and will be on a mission to hopefully figure this out before the twins get here!!!

Chirstmas with the Eltons

2010-12-24T05:16:00.000-08:00

We had so much fun celebrating Christmas with my family. We celebrated Dec 23rd starting at 4:00. We walked into my mom and dad's house with the smell of yummy Italian food. They catered Portillos spaghetti with chicken parm, pompie chicken ravioli with this yummy stuffed pizza loaf, and sausage from portillos too. Janna made a walnut, cranberry, goat cheese salad to go along with the dinner. Everything tasted so scrumptious (as judith would say).

After dinner they crew sang Happy Birthday to me. Janna made a stunning huge cupcake with polka dots (so me). It was such an enjoyment to watch Blake sing the actual Happy Birthday song to me. He loved it and so did I!

Soon after happy birthday Richie was Santa and handed out gifts to all of us. The boys did so good waiting their turn to open gifts. Blake was totally into Christmas this year. He would sit on his knees, hands folded, and wait for Uncle Rich to call his name. He ripped opened the gifts and would hold them up. He learned very soon to make a pile of all his presents. All night he carried around his Wiggles and Toy Story 3 movie.

Soon it was time for my dad and mom to receive their gifts from us girls. We all pitched in to get them a new large screen TV. My mom cried and my dad was so grateful. They deserve a gift like that!!!

We were able to spend some time one on one with the Scottbergs before the rest of the family arrived. All the kids were downstairs and played video games with the guys, while us women were relaxing on the couch talking. Blake just had a hay day with Parker and Kent. He would run around, grab their hands, call their names, and just want to be by them!!! Blake's smile and squeals were so much fun to listen to through out the night.

While we were relaxing on the couch, I drank a huge glass of cold water hoping to get the little ones to move for my mom and Bethany. Nope...they didn't move. Soon through they will move for others to feel.

It hit 7 o'clock and the Mang family came. It got rowdy, loud, and energetic in the room. The kids just ran and ran and ran around. I love this year listening to the joy the kids got by playing with one another and being with each other. I guess because now Blake is apart of the "clan"

Santa came to our house at 7:30. Troy Kibler dressed up as Santa and walked into the house by the walkway. Someone yelled to the kids look outside look whose walking. All the kids ran to the window..I wish I could have taken a picture of all the little faces peering through the window to get a look at Santa. Soon Santa came in the front door and was greeted by adults and kids. The kids would go to him and look at him and then run away.

Santa was kind enough to sit in a chair and have all the kids sit on his lap. Parker, Nico, Gigi, and Wyatt did a pretty good job. Kent and Blake not so much into it. Pop Pop had to carry Kent and Blake to Santa. Kent sat on Santa lap, but Blake sat on Pop Pop's lap next to Santa. Blake wouldn't talk to Santa when it was his turn. Soon Santa was saying Merry Christmas to everyone, and Blake went up to him while Santa was sitting down...and his little voice said among the loud crowd, "I want Wiggles Santa" Oh my heart melted to see this little boy get the courage to talk to Santa so he made sure Santa knew what he wanted. I again of course didn't get a picture of it.

The kids had so much fun again opening more gifts with their cousins. This time Richie and Jason played Santa handing the gifts out to everyone. Blake did awesome waiting his turn. He sat on his knees again, bouncing up and down with his hands folded. He waited and waited....he would look at Richie and anticipated him calling his name out for a gift. There was one point that I looked at Blake and he was mouthing to Richie, "me, me, me" and pointing to himself. It touched my heart that he was so sweet about it. He wasn't screaming, yelling, or mad it wasn't his turn he waited paitently, but yet so excited!!!

After Santa left we of course had lots of dessert to munch on. We then played white elephant which was crazy and insane! No lie...it was so loud the babies were moving through the game. They could here the loud and craziness that they are about to be born into.

We left the night at 10'o'clock. I hated to leave. The night was so much fun and so enjoyable for me. It goes by way too fast. That's what I hate about times I look forward to...they come and go so quickly!

I really enjoyed this year seeing Blake run around with his cousins, hearing his laughter and squeals with the gifts he opened. It was different this year because I didn't have to watch him to discipline him, I was able to observe him having a Christmas that I knew when I was growing up...and in return I was able to enjoy family time more and seeing his face light up with all the gifts and company.

What a great 2010 Christmas!!!!

20 Week appointment

2010-12-23T10:00:00.000-08:00

My 20 week appointment couldn't have gone any better. Jason was able to join me this time, so I was really happy to have his support. Whenever he comes with me to the dr. appoinments I feel supported and I feel like we are a team. So I throughly soaked in this moment!!!

The tech showed us the babies had changed positions last time we saw them and then confirmed (so did the dr) that we were having one of each. A boy and a girl to add to the Sidell household. Even as I type that we are having one of each, it still blows my mind we are having twins. NEver in my wildest dreams would I think we would be chosen to parent, love, and raise these two precious lives.

The results of the ultrasound were great. Reid is 13 oz and Tatum is 12 oz. Reid measured at 21 week and four days or so...Tatum measured at 20 days and 1 day. The dr wasn't concerned at all with the distance of days between the two. As the dr. scanned the babies, he showed us the nasel passage had been delveoped and that the limbs measured well. He looks for those things because he said that by doing so it shows that the babies are developing well and there are no signs of down syndrome. He said the babies look great and this is the way you would want your appointment to go. We were thrilled at the good news!!!!

Once again we are getting all these picture of Reid adn not too many of Tatum. I am more than half way there!!!!! If all goes well, I will deliver at 38 wks!!! 18 weeks to go and I know it will fly by!!!!! So much to get done and take care of before these little ones enter our lives and our homes.

So this is how I need to be

2010-12-21T05:33:00.000-08:00

Oh how I needed to read this....as I carry and await the arrival of the twins.

Then he went down to Nazareth with them and was obedient to them. But his mother treasured all these things in her heart." Luke 2:51NIV)

Devotion:
Not much is known about Mary, the mother of Jesus. It is obvious from the Scriptures that she was a young girl who loved God and was willing to obey Him at all costs. We don't know how God chose her to be the mother of His Son — we just know He did. Her response to the angel when she finds out about God's plan for her is our first clue as to why God knew she would be a great mother for Jesus: "I am the Lord's servant. May it be to me as you have said" (Luke 1:38, NIV). Recently, my children and I were reading in Luke where Jesus goes missing as a young teen, and His parents find Him in the temple. After searching for three days! As parents, we panic if we lose track of our child for a few minutes in a store. Can you imagine searching a city for three days for your 13 year-old son?

When they finally found Jesus, He was in the temple and wondered what all the fuss was about. The Scripture says that He told them He was where He should be, in His Father's house. "But they did not understand what He was saying to them" (Luke 2:50, NIV).

As my children and I read this passage, I tried to put myself in Mary's shoes. Her son had been missing. I am sure she vacillated between trusting God and panicking. And this was how I know that I would not have been a candidate for the Mother of Jesus award: as I tried to picture my reaction to finding Jesus in the temple after searching for three days, I pictured myself joyous and relieved. Then I pictured those feelings giving way to anger and questions.

Okay, so that was before the days of cell phones. He truly had no way to let His parents know where He was. But why didn't He stay with them in the first place? I got angry for Mary! And then I read the next verse: "But His mother treasured all these things in her heart" (Luke 2:51b, NIV).

The last time we saw Mary treasuring an event in her heart was right after her son was born. Once again, things were not going the way I would have wanted. She had given birth in a cold stable in dingy surroundings. Again, I was reminded of how accepting of her circumstances she was, and how her attitude reflected that. Our verse for today reminds us of a young woman at peace with her circumstances, trusting God no matter how things would work out. Fast forward 13 years later and she is still that kind, gentle woman — no yelling at Jesus, no threats, no yanking Him by the ear when they finally find Him. Instead, the Scriptures tell us that she treasured "all these things." Would I have been able to treasure that dirty stable? Would I have been able to treasure that seemingly errant teen? As I pondered these two times where Mary is seen treasuring her circumstances, I began to wonder how often things go wrong in my life and I react instead of reflect. So I'm allowing these two Scriptures to seep into my heart. Is my attitude, "May it be to me as You have said," or is it, "Okay, God, this is not the way it's supposed to be and I want You to fix it right away."

Finally

2010-12-18T19:17:00.000-08:00

At 19 wks and 4 days Jason finally felt the babies move. Night after night I have had him put his hand on me hoping he would feel them. Finally tonight he was able to feel one of them move. It was prob Reid because it was on my right side. Jason's reaction was a huge smile and chuckle...it was so fun!!!!

19 wk

2010-12-14T14:51:00.000-08:00

I went to my normal OB today. I measured at 24 wks and she saw the heartbeats on the ultrasound. She said that one baby (I think it's Tatum) Is breech with her feet in my lower belly and the other baby (I think Reid) is sideways, so babies are feet to feet. That would explain why I feel all my movement in one spot. Anyways, everything appeared to be doing good thus far. Next week's ultrasound at the hospital is a big appointment for us. There we will look at spine, heart, brain, weight, size, exc. I can't wait to hear..hopefully they aren't too far apart in growth and are doing really well.

Yesterday I decided that I was going to wrap gifts during Blake's nap time. That meant my usual time to read the Bible wasn't able to happen. I decided to listen to the Bible study online. One thing that hit me was something I have grown up and heard my whole life, " what Satan meant for harm, God intended it for good" (Gen 50)

I was very encouraged by that because I feel like the Lord was talking to me. What satan meant to harm me....with twins there is more stress, lack of sleep, marriages have a higher risk of spliting up with twins, family disunity, exc. But I know that God will make good out of it and will bless us with what Satan wanted to harm and cause bad in our lives.

Looking forward the many blessings twins will bring.

18 wks with the babes

2010-12-07T19:39:00.001-08:00

Today I was able to see Reid and Tatum on the ultrasound. The tech again said she believes we have one of each. Tatum was much more active this time around and Reid even nudged Tatum. Reid still seems to be a party animal and constantly moving.

I do not feel much movement. Here in there, maybe three times a week I will feel something. I am looking forward to the next three weeks where I will begin to feel much more defined little nudges from these two.

The dr. did an exam and said my risk for pre term labor is low. He said that means I will deliver most likely at 38 weeks. I know that I will be very uncomfortable and I will be huge, yet I will be grateful to hopefully be able to bring them straight home from the hospital. Things can always change, but that is my hope.

I have gained lots of weight...20pounds. It's more than I should gain at this point! I eat rather healthy. I have a salad everyday....I crave those! For about three weeks straight I was eating egg salad everyday. I am over that for now and into eating a cheese sandwhich with mustard on it. I love having baked cheetos after my lunch and into a glass of cold chocolate milk everyday. I usually have a pudding cup in the afternoon as well. I eat fiber one cereal and a tad bit of coffee every morning.

My clothes are fitting fine, well I should say maternity clothes. Although I am now thinking I am going to need more mediums as my pregnancy progresses. With Blake I wore all smalls. Oh well with two in the womb I am bound to be bigger.

I have tried working out. I do enjoy it, the problem is I like to rest when Blake is resting and don't want to get up in the morning cause I know in just four and half months I will have to get up early with babies. I want to enjoy my rest and sleep when I can.

It was great to see the babies today and see how active they are although I can't feel it. I go back in two weeks for a two hour appointment where they check the babies growth, weight, spine, EC.

Blakers

2010-12-04T05:36:00.000-08:00

This is Blake's 3rd Christmas, yet the first one that he is really getting into.

We went to the mall Nov. 21st and had our picture taken with Santa. Because I think he is understanding who Santa is, he was a bit scared but eventually warmed up to him. Blake told him all the stuff he wanted for Christmas (wiggles, toy story, shrek).

For my moms Gingerbread house contest this year, he actually was into making/eating the gingerbread house. He did a great job of biting the candy first and then putting it on his house.

He is into watching Christmas movies on TV at night when daddy gets home. We usually play and then at the end we watch a Christmas movie with the Christmas tree on.

Every morning when he wakes up he asks for "special juice." I usually give him a tiny bit of "egg nog" and then when we watch our movie at night I give him some more "special juice".

He loves loves loves his advent calender this year. He points to it on the counter and says "can i do it?" I like it cause we learn to identify numbers on it...he does pretty good with it.

Blake wasn't too much into decorating the tree this year. We let him put on ornaments, but instead he wanted to play. He put on about three ornaments and that was it.

I took Blake Christmas shopping with me this year and told him the gifts were for his nephews so he wouldn't know that they were bought for him.

I love this little boy! I love how he is getting Christmas and soon we will be talking about Jesus' birthday this Christmas season. I want to read it to him every night so it sinks in just as much as Santa does.

Random: Blake has lately been into Calliou, Wiggly Waffle show, playing with his play food, and using the words : goodness and delicious.

Parenting

2010-11-30T13:28:00.000-08:00

Somethings I have read on parenting from crosswalk.com and want to remember

*****Provide your children with the sense of security that comes when your actions are consistent with your words. (based on Matthew 5:37 from parenting by design)

*****try walking beside your kids as you lovingly allow them to experience the consequences of their choices. This is a far better way to create an environment in which a child can understand and embrace God's design for his life.
Pick your battles and avoid exasperating your kids. Eph 6:4: Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord (NIV). (parenting by design nov.4 2010)

*****When your children require a consequence for something they have done, consider the difference between punishment and discipline. Punishment creates a temporary break in relationship. Discipline walks alongside them through the bad choice, the way God walks alongside us as a result of Christ's sacrifice.
Show God's love by walking with your children through their bad decisions rather than causing a separation from them through punishment. 1 John 4:18: "There is no fear in love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and whoever fears has not been perfected in love" (NASB). (Parent by design Oct 8)

****** Approach discipline with the understanding that you need to train your kids to develop good attitudes and actions. Remember that the root word of discipline is "disciple" and realize that disciplining your kids is a vital part of their spiritual growth. Don't make excuses for them when they behave badly. Instead, challenge them to learn how to do better, and help and encourage them along the way.
(Dr. John Rosemond crosswalk.com)

Lord is Trustworthy!

2010-11-29T12:03:00.001-08:00

Today I was compelled during my quiet time to listen to Shane and Shane Psalm 145. I decided to look up the verse in the message version and here is what it said:

Psalm 145: 13-21

The LORD is trustworthy in all he promises
and faithful in all he does.[c]
14 The LORD upholds all who fall
and lifts up all who are bowed down.
15 The eyes of all look to you,
and you give them their food at the proper time.
16 You open your hand
and satisfy the desires of every living thing.

17 The LORD is righteous in all his ways
and faithful in all he does.
18 The LORD is near to all who call on him,
to all who call on him in truth.
19 He fulfills the desires of those who fear him;
he hears their cry and saves them.
20 The LORD watches over all who love him,
but all the wicked he will destroy.

21 My mouth will speak in praise of the LORD.
Let every creature praise his holy name
for ever and ever.

Shared with me awhile

2010-11-18T05:16:00.000-08:00

There was a song that my sister shared with me awhile ago as she was going through a trial in her life.

The lines to this song are ringing in my head today in regards to all that is going on:

There is nothing above you, there is nothing beyond you
There is nothing you can't do
Whatever will come, we will rise above
You fail us not, you fail us not

No matter the war, our hope is secure
You fail us not, you fail us not

You are bigger than the battle
Whatever will come, we'll rise above
You fail us not!!!

Peace again admits all that is going on around me these last few months. It's amazing how as I go about m day and think about everything taking place in my life right now, I get so stressed, overwhelmed, fearful, anxious, exc

Then I come to sit at my computer to look up Scripture and play worship music, and at that time I am given hope to all that is happening around me!

Thank you Lord for another day of reassuring me you are for me, my family, my friends, and my future!

15 weeks and 1 day

2010-11-17T12:39:00.000-08:00

Today I went to got another ultrasound of the twins.

I was given six pictures of the babies by the ultrasound tech!!! I love getting pics of my precious little ones.

Baby B is curled up in like an upside down U shape. It has been and continues to be a very chill relaxed baby. It tilted it's head back and for a bit, but continued to be laid back as it was in the previous ultrasound.

Baby A was rocking and rolling in my belly. It was waving, kicking, moving it's head back and forth. It was having a good old time in there. Same as last time we saw it on the ultrasound...a very active little one!!!

I had a cervical length test in which they check for signs of pre term labor. Everything seemed to be okay and I go back in three weeks for the same type of appointment.

I have gained PLENTY of weight thus far. Kind of concerned with gaining too much too fast. Trying once again to choose healthy foods for the little ones. I have felt a little movement here and there. Maybe five times through out the week total. Should be getting more frequent as I get closer to twenty weeks.

Another Reminder I am not forgotten

2010-11-16T12:09:00.000-08:00

Psalms 121:

I lift up my eyes to the hills where does my help come from? (v.1)
My help comes from the Lord the Maker of heaven and earth. (v.2)

He will not let your foot slip he who watches over you will not SLUMBER......(v.3)
The Lord watches over you the Lord is your shade at your hand......(v.5)

The Lord will watch over your coming and going from now and forevermore!(v.8)

My God does not sleep, my God fights for me when I don't even know it. My God keeps me from falling, My God is for me! My God doesn't sleep, he is constantly keeping me in his safe, loving, compassionate faithful hands!!!!

Once again, a reminder that through all my trails with Jason's job, planning for twins, Jason's dad, a friend's sick baby, a friend's broken marriage, a friend's barren womb, Lord....you do not SLUMBER you are constantly helping us and working behind the scenes protecting us from the enemy!

You Never Let Go

2010-11-15T12:28:00.000-08:00

How perfect are the lyrics of David Crowder's song: You Never Let Go

Right now in my life, there is a ton going on in terms of trials. I was working out today and heard this song, and immediately felt like it spoke directly to the situations I am facing.

I have felt for some time now kind of forgotten. I have felt like I have been praying for so long for several things that have not come to pass. In hearing these lyrics today, I am reminded of several things:

1) Obviously through all that we face, through the on going trials that seem to be at our feet day after day, consuming our minds, HE WILL NEVER LET GO!

2) Ever faithful, ever true,......that is what remains through our constant trials. How could I feel forgotten by Him or pushed aside when I know in my heart He is ever faithful!

3) When disaster came, oh my soul oh my soul....fills with hope. The hope that I know He is working behind the scenes, the hope that I know that He has my future in his hands, the hope that I know He has the next minute that I breath under his control.

4) Joy and pain, in sudden rain..your the same...you never let go. In all my fear, tears, pain, heartaches, questions, I know that Jesus is the same. He is the same God that healed my marriage, he is the same God that provided a way for me to go to college, the same job that provided me a teaching job, the same job that gave us the birth of our first son Blake, the same God that has restored relationships in my life. He is the same God that parted the red sea, he is the same God that delivered from the promise land after years and years....

He is the same God that wants to help me triumph through all the trials I have going on in my life....how could I feel forgotten when I know that He is for me, when I know He hears my cries, when I know that I don't see any evidence of him working on my behalf....he is orchestrated a beautiful future for me and my family!

Thank you Lord for speaking to my heart today and giving me hope...thank you Lord for never letting me go!

2010-11-13T08:23:00.001-08:00

Don't want to forget: Blake has been playing pretend play now more and more. He is about 37-38 months.

He is also very much into "helping mommy" clean, fold laundry, cook, wash my feet (crazy yes).

Lately too, if I tell him I am tired or dont feel good, he comes to me and says: I hug you and all better!

He still loves his bear and is doing better going potty! However, with this time change we put him to bed at 8:30 and he gets up at 6:30..killer on us. I think to myself though in five or so short months we will be getting up way earlier than that with the twins.

Still blows my mind we are having twins. I just can't seem to get over it!!!

almost 13 wks

2010-10-29T14:31:00.000-07:00

Now that I am finally feeling better, I am able to eat a TON more!!!! I think I am starting to have cravings....meat!

Today Blake and I went outside and racked some leaves. He had a blast jumpping in them and helping me.

These are the moments of just Blake and mommy that I will miss!

Going Public

2010-10-27T12:39:00.000-07:00

Today is the first time I am actually going public that we are expecting twins. I have known now for six weeks that we were having these two precious babies. I am now 12 weeks along and had an ultrasound today. It was amazing to see two babies wiggling around. Baby A was waving, moving around a ton and Baby B was laying there relaxed and at one point gave us a wave (in which Jason counted five fingers on his hand).

They are looking good and measuring a week ahead. Almost right next to one another...one is measuring 13 weeks and one is measuring a little over 13 weeks. They are set right next to one another and are fraternal twins! We are thinking we will have one boy and one girl.

I went and saw MFM dr today in which I will be seeing quite a bit through my pregnancy. I get lots of ultrasounds with twins which is wonderful...more views of the little ones is always fun.

Jason went with me today and just grinned and smiled and talked about how excited he is about the twins coming. We celebrated a good doctors appointment over lunch at Rock Bottom..I was able to eat a hamburger and pretzel appetizer.....so yummy!

We feel so blessed to finally be able to open about the twins and are trusting God's hand upon this whole pregnancy!

Blake is now 2.5

2010-10-09T16:07:00.001-07:00

Blake recently turned 2.5 and he is developing so much. He is into doing puzzles and can carry on a conversation so well. The dr. told me that he has great fine and gross motor skills. She said the fact that he can talk and she, being a stranger can understand him is very good. He is in 90% weight and 50% height. Blake is still working on being potty trained.

Today I wasn't feeling well, and he said " mommy hug...you feel better" He kept giving me so many hugs today. He also is into something we call a family hug. Every night when Jason gets home we make a big circle standing up and hug eachother at the same time...a family circle hug. He loves it! He asks for it! He gets the biggest smile on his face when we do our family hug.

Lastly, Jason has to give him a kiss, hug, and rub on head and me a kiss, hug, and rub on head before he leaves for work. He thought Jason forgot one morning and ran after him. "Daddy me hug! Daddy me hug!" My dad told me that's how I was when I was a kid.

Recently

2010-10-02T18:48:00.000-07:00

Blake has recently started praying out loud with us. He will begin his prayers...usually it's "Jesus...mumble...mumble....Amen!" I love those moments!!!

Currently

2010-09-16T16:36:00.000-07:00

Currently as I type this, Blake is having one of his moments. What I mean by that is he is having a melt down and is refusing to clean up his toys. He is in timeout and is not allowed to have mommy hold him or have bear. He has been throwing his tantrum for twenty min now.

Everything in me wants to snuggle that boy, hold him, kiss him, and clean up the toys for him. It pains me to have to see him so upset and screaming so loud.

I however have a responsibility to follow Proverbs 22:6 "train a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it"

Picking up the toys for him or holding him right now wouldn't be the best way to train him.

I can't wait for him to follow the rules so that I can actually hold him and love on him...come on little one...what a reward when you pick up the toys...more snuggle time with mom!

Yepo...yepo

2010-09-15T19:09:00.000-07:00

Well...we had the OB appointment today. I went in and they put the external ultrasound on my belly and she said, "I see one hearbeat for sure." Then she was quiet and she said, " I think I see two"

She decided to do an internal ultrasound to get a better picture, and sure enough...she saw two beating heartbeats in the 130s and confirmed twins.

Jason and I are shocked and overwhelemd. We feel blessed God would see us fit to be parents to three children.

I called my mom first = cried
Called my dad next = I cried, he talked to Jason, he said it's going to be okay and we will stand by you through this
Bethany = screamed and so excited
Then texted Kimberly, Kelly, Judith, Julie, and Janna.....they are all happy for us and Janna was shocked too.

Everyone is happy, everyone is excited, everyone is so eager to help, and everyone is wondering if one will be a girl.

So let the crazy, exciting, journey begin!

ps- last night I had a dream I had twins...sure enough today..boom yepo..yepo...I am a mother of mulitples!

Sharing

2010-09-10T18:47:00.000-07:00

I am trying to teach Blake to share. We do at least one playdate a week in which he is given plenty of opportunities to learn how to share his toys with his friends.

This morning, I was preparing him for the kids that were about to come over. I was telling him that when his friends get here we don't take toys out of their hands and we don't yell "MINE"

I then began to tell the story of the little boy in the Bible who shared his lunch with those who didn't have any. I told him it made Jesus so happy that the little boy shared. I went on to say how Jesus wants Blake to share too. My little boy looked at me with both of his palms up and says, "where Jesus mommy?" I told him in heaven and next to him....her precedes to say, "but where he go?"

I love that boy! I can only hope he can know where Jesus is at a very young age!

Rough one

2010-09-03T18:49:00.000-07:00

It's been a rough two weeks here. Potty training Blake has consumed me. He's done pretty well, but I can't ever be lazy about it. It's very intentional on my part. Timing the last time he went, watching for signs he is about to go, and then trying to entertain and keep him excited to go on the potty.

On top of it, he has been waking up at 7:00 and only taking about an hour nap. That means I am unable to do my morning chores and get ready before he awakens and I have just enough time to read my bible, straighten the house, and eat a snack before he wakes up from his nap.

As a result of being drained with potty training (which is so worth it to me) and him not sleeping much, I have been on edge with him. I have realized that my patience level has been very slim. I go to bed at night wishing I would have handled situations better. My temper, fatigue, frustration has definitely won instead of my peace, patience, and understanding.

I have decided I need to be more at ease and never get tired of doing good...never get tired of doing the right thing when dealing with Blake.

I have come to realize to be a good parent takes lots of work and energy. It would be easy for me to let things go and not stay on top of discipline. I however have a responsibility to God to raise Blake with morals, to love the Lord, and do honor and respect those in his life.

I will do what I can and offer myself daily as a vessel to be used by God to mold and shape my child....what a CALLING that is!

Round 1 for number 3 (written in Sept.)

2010-09-01T04:29:00.000-07:00

First appointment today for the little one came on the 3rd month anniversary of when we lost our 2nd child. It was hard and I became a bit teary eyed as we discussed our action plan for this pregnancy.

We decided to go ahead and take some blood to see where my levels are. It's critical to have good progesterone levels. The Dr. then said that we would go ahead and test again on Thursday. Hoping to get results Friday that they have doubled. If all goes well, then Sept. 28th we will do an ultrasound for a heartbeat. If a heartbeat is detected then the chance for miscarriage goes down to 3-4%.

Praying my levels go up, praying I get a heartbeat on Sept. 28th. I get nervous about every little thing. Should I feel this, why am I not feeling this? It's a battle I fight mentally and a battle I fight in prayer.

And the due date for this little one is May 10, 2011....crazy it's the day I miscarried our 2nd child.

This is for my personal records

2010-08-26T05:54:00.001-07:00

Taking note of what the approach was for Blake to be potty trained.

When Blake was 18 months old he was asking to sit on the potty. He would cry because he wanted to sit on it so bad. We decided to wait to potty train til he was in a big boy bed (which was super easy for him). Once he was in the big boy bed for about a month and a half we started to potty train.

I talked about going on the potty for several weeks and who goes on the potty: mommy, daddy, b, parker, kent, meg, ryan, brieg, sage, exc.

We talked about how they all wear big boy and girl underwear. We watched elmo on potty and read potty books.

Often he would observe mommy and daddy on potty. He wanted to use the potty so bad, but instead of telling him no I would tell him soon.

The week before we were going to start using the potty I let him pick one out and I set it up in the bathroom. I talked through what was going to happen in a couple days. He was going to sit on potty, go pee pee and get candy if he did. He then went to walmart and picked out his own underwear with daddy (toy story and elmo).

The night before we were potty training I had a crate with his name on it and bought all new books from the dollar store. I showed him the crate and put it next to the potty and explained that when he sits on the potty he can read his new books.

The day came when we began to do the actual potty training. In talking to family who has done it before, I decided Blake would wear underwear and we would show him that we had no diapers left! We decided that in addition to that we would give him lots to drink that day. I knew he was going to have accidents, but by giving him lots to drink he is bound to make it to potty at least once in the day.

So Monday Aug. 23rd was the day! He woke up and came downstairs and I told him that the diapers are all gone and it's time to pick out which underwear he wanted to wear. We sat him on the potty first thing in the morning and he was successful! He went! The day carried on with four accidents that morning. I put him on the potty every fifteen min (with the timer dinging to let us know when) and he would sit for five min or so. We would read all his new books while he was trying to go. Several times when we began to sit on the potty he would often go two or three min after getting up. That was maddening for me....we were so close to catching it. The day went on we continued to sit on the potty now every 20 min or so. We had more successes that day as we progressed into the evening.

I will never forget the first time he went pee in the potty! His eyes got so big and he had the biggest smile on his face. I was so proud of him!!! We started out his reward for going on the potty the first day and a half was getting three or four M&Ms and doing the potty dance with mommy and daddy...accompanied by Blake playing the guitar.

Day 1 went pretty good with several accomplished potty times. I think giving him lots to drink...making him lots to drink making him have to pee often it taught him what the peeing sensation was and then I in return had to look for warning signs he was going to pee and keep a timer as well.

It consumed all of me...day 1 of potty training is all I did! I would look at the timer and see if he was grabbing himself, getting big eyes, or standing still for a few seconds. Then if any of those happened I put him on the potty.

Day 2 was better. The morning was rough we had five accidents in the morning on day 2, but then we go the swing of it and by 11 that day he remembered what to do and there were 8 successes the rest of the day. On day two I decided to go ahead and add a sticker book as a reward. Anytime he went potty he would get to put a sticker in his book.

Day 3 was amazing! No poop on day one or two..he didn't want or just choose not to go! Day three he had no accidents til when daddy walked in the door. I was so proud of Blake! He went poo on potty twice and once right next to potty. I was impressed that had no accidents and now...he tells me peee mommmy pee!

I still ask him, but am glad he at times can recognize on his own as well.

Day 4 which is today! He woke up as we always do and uses the potty right away! Firs thing we do is kiss, hug, and use potty! I have stayed in the house since Monday when we began potty training....I am so tempted to venture out in public now and see how he does in the REAL world!

We haven't touch potty training at night. We let him wear a pull up for nap and bedtime. I am trying to focus on during the day first.

I am wondering what will be different with our next child. Will they be interested in the potty as early as Blake was...will wearing underwear right away be the route to go?

I just know that my cleaning supplies are still on my counter for when accidents happen: disinfectant wipes, 409, resolve, and a spray bottle of vinegar and water. I used those TONS the first two days...now 409 is what we use to clean potty out!

The teacher in me enjoyed potty training. The sense of accomplishment we both felt when he was successful was so rewarding. The number of successes far out weighed the number of accidents. Even if we had just three successes it kept me going. I believed Blake could do it! I was so happy for him!

As I was...

2010-08-25T12:56:00.001-07:00

praying today I was offering my heart to the Lord. Offering All of me...completly...everything...the fear...the doubt...the brokenness...the hurt...and when I was doing so a realization hit me....he LOVES me. With all the pieces of my heart that are struggling right now, he LOVES me. What a true overwhelming sense I had come over me that nothing can or will separate us from the love of Christ.

I had read in my devotions last week how one of the functions of the Holy Spirit is to confirm to us our relationship with Christ. Today, I can say that was fully accomplished as I was praying.

Thank you Lord that you love EVERY SINGLE part of me!!!!

Little Dry

2010-08-24T12:34:00.000-07:00

My walk with the Lord recently has been a bit rough. With our miscarriage in May, Jason's dad recent diagnosis of cancer spreading, waiting for God to answer some other families prayer requests, and Jason's current job situation I have been left questioning where is the Lord in all this.

I know what I have been raised with and know what I have then grown to believe on my own. I know that God is in all my questioning right now. I know he is okay with it and ultimately, I know it will deepen my walk with the Him. With these questions I know satan is hoping for me to be distant from the Lord...however I know I will draw closer to the Jesus during this time.

If anything what I am dealing with here is not just questions, but a spiritual battle.

During my devotion time I read somethings that really stuck out to me and have given me a hope:

*Prayer and faith are the way to victory
*Security is in the name of the Lord
*In the victories there is joy and glory

A line to a song I keep repeating:
In every season
You are still God
I have a reason to sing
I have a reason to worship

And I will bring praise
I will bring praise
No weapon formed against me shall remain

May came and went and so did life

2010-08-14T19:34:00.001-07:00

Jason and I decided that we were going to try and expand our family in April. We became successful and were so excited to announce to family Mother's Day weekend of our little peanut.

Two days after the announcement came a fearful dreaded event that I never imagined I would go through .....we miscarried the precious growing baby.

I won't forget that day...ever! My dad came right to my house and sat with me til my mom and grandma could get there. When he came into the door, he gave me a long hug and said..."The Lord is the giver and taker of life...He gives and takes away" That in itself made me feel like I didn't cause the miscarriage, but it was God's plan for our family. I had to be content and okay with it.

It's been three months and it has taken me sometime to be "okay" with it. Not that I will ever be....but I know the more I share this pain that I have experienced, the more I realize there are many other women who have walked that same road.

I trust that the Lord is the giver and taker of life, and trust that when he sees fit he will give us another little peanut to love and be apart of our family!

Fighting with Jason

2010-07-09T05:07:00.001-07:00

Jason and I often argue over who can put Blake to sleep at night. We both love to do it because it's an opportunity for affection and love from and to our son. I am able to put Blake down for a nap, so Jason feels like he should get to put him to bed.

Last night, I won! I was able to put the little man to sleep. The routine used to be: read book on mom/dad's bed, pray, rock and sing to sleep in chair in bedroom.

now it's lay down in his big boy bed, pray, and then sing to him. Hsere is the thing though, when we sing him to sleep he lays on his belly and I lay on mine. He wraps his little arm around my neck to give me a hug. I rest my cheek on his cheek and we hum together "Ti's So Sweet to Trust in Jesus" and then.....he says...mommy leave.

I miss those days of rocking him to sleep, but I do love the little hug around the neck as we sing our good night song!

Been hit

2010-07-06T05:24:00.001-07:00

Since May, we have been hit with several difficult issues. I will stand firm and hold true to what I know in God's word to help me get through it. There are times where I feel weak and feel like will it get better, but when I read Scripture and put on worship music it all fades away. Hopefully, situations will begin to work out and things will begin to get brighter....I am thankful through it all I have God's sovereign hand upon my life and my family's life!

Exodus 14:14
The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be still!

Too much

2010-07-04T06:18:00.001-07:00

Too much for mommy!

Blake had his first night in his big boy bed. We gave Blake our bedroom set because we got a new one. He felt so special that he got a pillow (first time sleeping with one) and he was able to sleep in "mommy and daddy's bed" He didn't get out once, not even when he woke up in the morning. Hopefully nap time will be just as smooth and the nights to come as well.

I am so proud of him, yet so sad that the crib (his old bed) is put in the what will be someday the new baby's room.

Now on our checklist we will potty train sometime this fall I think....just want to make sure before we do that the big boy bend is conquered.

Amazed

2010-06-19T05:19:00.000-07:00

Today I celebrate 6 years with Jason. I am amazed at God's hand of blessing on our marriage through the 6 years. In the 6 years we have been married, we have gone through what most couples don't through in the first ten years of marriage. I never imagined we would be where we are today. I am forever grateful that we both found the good in one another worth fighting for. When others didn't believe in us, when others advised us to move on and quit...we continued to push on and go forward. I contribute our long journey and making it through some of the toughest times to Christ. . He has been our rock, he has been so faithful, and his promises to bless us has been more than we could have imagined.

I love you Jason, and as we say: we have at least 54 more years of life together!

Start of what will be added to

2010-06-01T10:21:00.000-07:00

Blake's language:

hold you mommy: when he wants to be held
otay: okay
dejesus: Jesus
how to: (now replaced with the right word) my turn
fimming: swimming
ficecream: ice cream
tookie: cookie

I love how he tries to say his words. He may not say it right, but I have already seen him correct himself to the right pronunciation.

mixed

2010-05-28T05:15:00.000-07:00

I have mixed feelings today with it being teachers last day of school. I go back to the emotions I had when my students would leave me for the year. It was so sad to say good bye to some of them and yet so exciting to begin my time off for the summer. Now that I am not teaching, I think about what it was like at the end of may, the end of the school year....and to be honest...I really do miss teaching. I know people say I can always go back and do it again, but to work with the same staff and parents I had will never be! I miss and I enjoyed that season in my life.

Recycle

2010-05-21T13:17:00.001-07:00

I know I posted this song several months back....but once again it's on my mind.

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead, bold and confident
Takeing every step in obedience
While I'm waiting
I will serve You
While I'm waiting
I will worship
While I'm waiting
I will not faint
I'll be running the race
Even while I wait

I'm waiting
I'm waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I'm waiting on You, Lord
Though it's not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve You while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting
I will serve you while I'm waiting
I will worship while I'm waiting on You, Lord

I've learned

2010-05-15T11:08:00.000-07:00

I have always thought contentment was in regards to being content with what you have: the house you live in, the car you drive, the clothes you wear, exc.

Recently, I think God is teaching me to be content on where he has me and situations that are happening in my life that are beyond my control.

Stink!

2010-05-14T13:10:00.001-07:00

Life is a bit disappointing right now in several areas.

Wondering

2010-05-03T04:46:00.000-07:00

Wondering what it means for my family to "sacrifically" give?

So nice yet so sad

2010-04-29T05:24:00.000-07:00

I went to see a hematologist yesterday to discuss my blood clots. The dr. I went to go see is a hematologist but also a cancer dr. He was so nice and patient with me and all my questions. We talked for at least a half hour. He even took time to tell me a personal story that happened when he was working with one of his patients. It was sad though....when I walked to use the restroom, there were cancer patients getting treatment....they were all lined up and hooked up to a machine. It broke my heart! A part of me wanted to sit and talk with them, just be a friend to them....and then a part of me wanted to turn my head and not even look because it broke my heart so much.

Needless to say my appointment went well. They are doing more blood work to determine if my blood clots were genetic or caused by my c-section. I have been wondering that question for over two years now, I am so excited to finally get results! The good news is he looked at my lump in my throat and he also said it's not a concern to him. So he is the third dr. to say that! Praise the Lord!

Little one

2010-04-28T04:22:00.000-07:00

I don't know what's going on...maybe it's part of turning two..not sure.

You aren't napping. You are exhausted and you start to fall asleep in my arms but then when I put you down in your crib you scream! Scream for an hour or more (of course I go in and sooth every 5/10/15 min.) At bed time you are also doing the same thing. My heart hurts for you because I know you need the nap and will not do so. You have also started to twitch and jerk in your sleep. When I called the dr. to ask questions about it, they said not to worry. Of course as your mother, I have already cried over it and prayed over you about it.

I can only hope this is a few day stage thing for you and you snap out of it and begin to sleep soundly, peacefully, and long.

When praying for family today.....

2010-04-19T13:20:00.001-07:00

This song came to my mind:

The blood that Jesus shed for me,
'Way back on Calvary;
The blood that gives me strength from day to day,
It will never lose its power.

It reaches to the highest mountain,
It flows to the lowest valley,
The blood that gives me strength form day to day,
It will never lose its power.

It soothes my doubts and calms my fears,
And it dries all my tears;
The blood that gives me strength from day to day,
It will never lose its power.

The Blood that gives : hope, healing, strength, joy, may it be ours today in each situation we face!

Revisit

2010-04-16T13:00:00.000-07:00

I revisited my old journals from college and really enjoyed reading my thoughts on life. Even though I had my struggles during that time, I was so close to the Lord then. I am grateful I have kept those journals and am able to review them from time to time.

Something I reviewed recently was an issue with my health. In 2002 I had a lump in my throat and I ended up having x-ray and an ultrasound done on. From that report, the referred me to a specialist who then decided not to operate on the lump. In the past month or so, I had noticed the lump and grew concerned about it once again. I couldn't remember what the dr. said about the lump back in 2002, but thankfully I had my journal to review it. Dr. Altimari had looked at my throat and decided not to operate on it and told me that lump will always be apart of me from now on. Nothing to worry about, but will always be there.

With Jason and I wanting and thinking about trying for another baby sometime this year, I really would like to have a clean bill of health. I decided to go to my current dr. (westerholm) and have them recheck the lump in my throat. My dr. today told me not to worry about the lump and that it will always be in my throat. I was relieved to not have to worry about something that had consumed my mind the past two months. In addition to my dr. looking at my throat, she also began to talk to me about my blood clots from my pregnancy with Blake. She said based on my blood work done in 2008, most likely my blood clot was caused by my c-section, not a disorder that I have. She then refereed me to a hematologist who will talk to me about what to do with the fact of having a history of blood clots. Having had blood clots in the lungs is much more serious than having them in the legs.....so the dr. wanted to take precaution on that whole issue.

I am thankful that God took care of me today. I had prayed prior to the appointment that the dr. wouldn't want me to get another ultrasound or x-ray of my throat to look at the lump. She didn't request that at all during my appointment. She did request blood work to check out my blood count, kidney, liver, thyroid, and iron. But she said she is not thinking she will find anything alarming in those results.

As I opened my Bible today, I read

Psalms 12:5-6
But I trust in your unfailing love, my heart rejoices in your salvation I will sing to the Lord for he has been good to me!

God is good, Yes...he is good ALL the time!

Leaning on this:

2010-04-13T13:01:00.000-07:00

Tis So Sweet to Trust in Jesus
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tis so sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to take Him at His word;
Just to rest upon His promise,
Just to know "Thus saith the Lord"

Jesus, Jesus, how I trust Him!
How I've proved Himo'er and o'er!
Jesus, Jesus, precious Jesus!
O for grace to trust Him more!

O how sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just to trust His cleansing blood;
Just in simple faith to plunge me
"Neath the healing, cleansing flood!

Yes, 'tis sweet to trust in Jesus,
Just from sin and self to cease;
Just from Jesus simply taking
Life and rest, and joy and peace.

I'm so glad I learned to trust Him,
Precious Jesus, saviour, friend;
And I know that He is with me,
Will be with me to the end.

Learning once again.......

2010-04-12T13:00:00.001-07:00

to put into practice all I have been taught about the Lord. My trust, my strength, and my peace have to come from him!

My thoughts on my blog

2010-04-08T05:07:00.000-07:00

I have been so consumed with thoughts of President Obama lately. I know when he was elected he promised "change" Change is fine with me, however I feel like what he is changing is so drastic. From health care to now nuclear treaty arms....to abortions and gays. I feel like as a conservative I am a minority. What I believe based on my faith and the Bible doesn't matter anymore. It's hard to find those in this world who believe what I believe. I honestly do feel like an alien as it says in the Bible.

There is just something about Obama that makes me feel uneasy and brings alot of concern. It's hard for me honestly not to cringe when I see him on the news. I have to do what the Bible calls me to do and that is pray for my leader. I am however extremely grateful that the true leader in this world is Christ and the leader of my life and family is Jesus. I can choose him to lead safely, securely, and peacefully! Oh the joys of knowing Jesus!!!!!

On purpose

2010-04-05T23:55:00.000-07:00

Little one.....
When I am laying on the floor playing with you, you will grab my face with your little chubby hands and then turn my cheek to your lips and give me a big kiss! When you do that, I jerk up and scream and you just laugh and laugh. I do it over and over just to get some extra kisses and hugs from you. I love our little games we play.

In the mind of Sharonie:

2010-03-30T12:42:00.001-07:00

I wonder:
* When will Blake stop taking an afternoon nap
* What new recipes I will learn this summer
* What the next three months hold for the Sidell clan
* If there will be a major world disaster in America
* What ministry Jason and I will get involved in
* How our summer will be with storms
* Will we have good weather on vacations coming up?
* If I will impact someone's life
* If Jason's job is secure
* Will gas keep going up this summer
* Will I make a new friend in the next couple months...will old friends fade away?

Oh the mind of Sharonie never stops...it keeps going and going and wondering and wondering.......

8:01 am

2010-03-24T05:13:00.000-07:00

Blakers.....today we get to sing to you your favorite song for real..."Happy Birthday" Yepo at 8:01 today you were born to us two years ago. I will never forget the details of that day. And to think you are about 21 pounds more than what you were two years ago and so much taller too. You amaze me in your vocabulary for a two year old and how smart you are! I hope soon you will know more of who Jesus is and his love for you!

I love you dearly and can't wait for your Elmo Party on Saturday. Daddy and I bought you a Car (much like the red and yellow ones) that you sit in....but this one plays music, and a home depot drill saw. I can't wait to go to Chucky Cheese with you and daddy tonight! You are a big boy now and so independent. I love you and am so blessed to be your mommy!

Replay

2010-03-16T06:06:00.001-07:00

Oh little one...sometimes when you are in bed, I replay things you say through out the day and then I miss you!

Changes

2010-03-10T18:34:00.000-08:00

Blake turns two in a few weeks and ALL of the sudden we have encountered new territory. He has fought to go to bed...when before we would rock him for two min. and he would tell us "night night momma" He has now started to throw tantrums. I know it's normal and part of learning for a child to control themselves, but again new territory for us as parents.

We have decided a few things since we have encountered these new happenings with Blake.

1) Bedtime is now 8:30 instead of 8. We read a few books before bed instead of snuggling in bed watching TV. Nap time is also moved a half hour ahead to 1:45 instead of 2:15. With these changes...he has gone to bed a bit smoother for us. It wasn't easy at first and he cried for 15 -20 min the first three nights...but now he has adjusted to the changes.

2) Throwing tantrums...we put him in a safe place and we let him do his deal and remind him mommy and daddy are ready to talk to him when he stops.

With Blake changing...our routines change...and hopefully mommy and daddy can be in tuned to the Lord and have wisdom in how to deal with the new happenings of a two year old!

Biggest Debate

2010-03-10T13:00:00.000-08:00

Lately I have wondered what to do about Blake's 2nd birthday. Do we have just family or do we have friends and family? I have decided that I am going to have just family. I love the big birthdays for the sole reason that Blake LOVES PEOPLE and he LOVES KIDS...therefore to have lots of his friends and family together at once he would so enjoy. The reason I am going just family is because down the road there will be plenty of years to have a friends party. This way by just having family, they can steal all the hugs and kisses they want from him!

Blessing in the delay

2010-03-04T05:01:00.000-08:00

I have talked to many of you on the phone about this, but I wanted to journal it and not forget what I learned.

Jason and I have been buying furniture for our home. We had seen chairs at Pier One that we loved and thought would really go well in our dining room. I had eyed them one day and told Jason we needed to purchase them. We ended up getting two initially to see if they worked...and they did! We love them. We had decided we would go back and purchase six more chairs. I was so anxious to get all six chairs around the table and wanted it so bad! I just wanted a complete set. My husband had decided he wanted to order new Chase cards that had some benifts to it when spending so much money. He wanted us to purchase the chairs and put it on the cardt. So I had to wait and wait for the Chase card to come in the mail. It finally came, I called Jason that day and said, we can get our chairs now. But then I looked closer and the envelope the card came in was opened and showed the account number. I was so annoyed because we had to order a new card, leaving us to wait longer to get our chairs. Ugh! Well needless to say, a few days later came our Chase card and then we were able to get the chairs for our dining room table.

On to this past Tuesday night (about two weeks after we ordered our chairs). Jason was searching Pier One's website to find captain chairs for the dining room table. He turns to me and suddenly says...oh my goodness, would you believe this....Pier One has our dining room chairs on sale for $40 less than what we paid for them. I was kind of sick over it. Thinking that stinks chunks! We just paid full price for each chair and now they are on sale! Ugh! Jason told me to call in the morning and ask if we could have a price adjustment.

With the suggestion from my cousin, I went on their website to see what the policy was for a price adjustment. It said that you had to buy the product within in two weeks to be able to get the money back. Well I look at the receipt and wouldn't you know we had one more day to do it!

Thank God we got the money adjustment for the chairs. And with what we were given back, it paid for one of the chairs and then some.

Here is my lesson: I was so annoyed that the Chase card took so long to come to the house and that we were having to wait to order the chairs I had my heart set on. However, if we would have bought those chairs anytime sooner, we would not have made the two week mark for the price adjustment. It was the Lord who had Jason find the chairs on sale on their website with a day to spare....and it was the Lord who delayed the Chase card....so that we could be blessed and get a chair basically free.

***** There are blessings in the delays....and God is still working on our behalf!

I know crazy lesson for me to learn over furniture and a Chase card....but grateful for me to be reminded of God's perfect plan for my life in ALL area!

Overnight with my husband

2010-03-01T13:50:00.000-08:00

Jason and I had a gift given to us for a night in a hotel in the city. We were so blessed to have had a night to ourselves in a hotel right by Mag mile. Weber grill was our choice for restaurant for the night. The food was wonderful! Then we walked along the mag mile to look for some winter hats. We found some hats for $3!!! We walked along the city streets. It wasn't cold at all, but so freeing for some reason. I had always wanted to go ice skating with Jason because he was a big hockey stud in high school and wanted to see him strut his stuff on the ice and teach me a few things. We decided to walk to skate on State street. A good mile or so walk from our restaurant. We get there and it was PACKED! However no one was on the ice. Everyone was standing on the ice watching ice dancers. We thought we missed the open skate. However...two min after that they opened the ice for the public. We quickly got in line to rent skates, and were fifth in line. Suddenly while waiting a man tapped Jason and asked if we were in line to rent skates...of course our answer was YES! He very nicely said the line was outside around the corner...there were several hundred people in line. We decided that we could wait to sake on State. But then my wonderful husband saw a sign for more outside skating just a few blocks away. We walked there and were able to enjoy a not so crowded skating rank. It was so fun!!! Jason pulled me around several times, he skated and showed off for me a bit, and then I skated arm in arm with him very slowly. I didn't fall once!

We enjoyed our night out and feel blessed to have had the chance for an overnight together in such a wonderful city.

More winter:

2010-03-01T13:41:00.000-08:00

Some more winter activities in the Sidell house is cooking, throwing the ball over the edge of the staircase, and playing with snow in the house.

Photo session

2010-02-26T13:41:00.003-08:00

Blake and I took pictures of each other. I took one of us....I took one of him...and then Blake took one of me. I think he might be a bit talented at photography :)

Never want to forget

2010-02-19T12:27:00.001-08:00

Blake (at 23 months old)

* saying ciao when leaving the room
* he is so used to having people over that he sits on the stairs staring out the door waiting for someone to come over...he'll ask...mimi...pop pop...addie
* yelling "to you" when rocking him to sleep so we sing "Happy Birthday"
* Sitting with daddy and reading the newspaper on Sunday morning
* Helping clean (swifter, vacuums, fold clothes, make the bed)
* When Blake is doing something he is not suppose to do he says "mommmmmmmmmy" and I look at him and he's eating playdough or touching the TV...he tells on himself
* Getting a bowl from the drawer when I say cereal
* Starting at 20 months to say "Mommy potty poo"
* Loving to tackle and take mommy and daddy down
* Loves to play catch
* When I get him from nap he won't look at my and is smiling ear to ear...I say to him "you are so silly" and then he laughs and looks at me
* Always said "hi" to strangers in the store
* Loves kids
* New word that is said many times a day "mine"
* Bows his head, folds his hand, and sqints his eyes to pray
* Love tookies (cookies)
* Runs to see daddy and greet him at the door when he comes home
* Asks for mimi, pop pop, colbi, parker, kent, B, and J everyday and my response everyday is they are at work or home
* Love bank (blanket) and bear
* Learning colors and everything is blue
* Could play with playdough all day
* Just started to enjoy painting
* Loves having Addie over for a playdate
* Enjoy skyping family members
* Gets his coat and tries to put it on along with his hat and shoes

So much more, but these are what stood out to me the most lately

This quake has me thinking

2010-02-10T05:22:00.000-08:00

I was woken up at 4:00 this morning by an earthquake. I didn't think it was one happening. I laid there while it happened and felt the house shake and heard the rattle. I then walked the floors and looked outside to see if it was a train, snowplow, or anything else. I was too tired to look online or turn the news on to see if it really was an earthquake. Instead I prayed myself back to sleep.

When I woke up and saw the headlines on the computer and TV it was confirmed there was an earthquake. I knew it...I wasn't going crazy. It was about 4.3 magnitude.

As I sit here and think about this earthquake, I am reminded of how there was one in 2008 at 4:00 in the morning that was felt in our area. I couldn't help but think....wow...the two years Blake has been alive, there have been two earthquakes that have happened where he has lived. And in the 30 years that I have been alive I have had a total of two.

I can't help but realize how different the times are we live in. Blake experiences more earthquakes, more economy problems, more people okay with gay and lesbians, more of a changing and shaky world than what I had experienced growing up. What I want to do as a parent is make his life as secure and normal as I can among all these negative things going on around him. Most importantly I want to teach him the world is a shaky hard place to live and things around us are so uncertain, but we serve a loving God who is constant, never changing, and steady!

Help me to live my life to be that living example to my son!

Partnership

2010-02-02T19:53:00.001-08:00

Being a parent and being on the same page as your spouse can be such a reward!

Change, Transition, and Risk

2010-01-28T06:45:00.000-08:00

Monday Jan. 11th
I feel as though change, transition and taking a risk is in our near future. I keep reading about it, sermon about it, and feel my conversations are consumed with it. We just turned down a position to go to IN for a job promotion, but I still feel like God is preparing us to take a risk in something and getting out of our comfort zone wanting us to trust him more. I heard a song on the radio on Sunday to help me be okay with change in our future. The song had a line that said, "God above all my hopes and fears....I am gonna be alright"

Not sure what that means, but I am anxious for God to reveal it to me. I am not sure if it means a job relocation. I am hoping it doesn't mean $ problems. We have been in such a comfort zone when it comes to his job, home, family in area, be staying home as a mom...that I hope it's none of those things. But I would be okay with relocating our family for Jason's job to make more $. Basically IN would have been a risk, change, and a position to where God would want to trust him, but it involved Jason traveling more adn being gone till 8 at night most nights. We felt for our family that this was not a job for a young growing family. Jason couldn't do faith and family first if he took that job. By saying no...Jason and I felt like we were sticking to priorities and to what would honor God.

As I feel change, transition, and risk is in our future.....I await in prayer and anticipation to see how and when this will all come about.

Wednesday January 13th
Today I read this in my devotions: Women must step out of their cozy comfort zones accept God's invitation to journey onward. When we sense the unmistakable stirring of the Holy Spirit beckoning us to a deeper walk, we have to decide to do what will stretch us. Fear of Change and the desire to avoid challenge often stand in the way of a believer's growing into an experiential relationship with God.

Call me crazy...but to feel in my heart on Saturday and Sunday that God does want to take us out of our comfort zone and then to read on Monday about taking risks and today about fear of change.... I see God is preparing us for something. I am willing to do and go wherever Christ may want me and my family. What is God stirring in my heart and when will I begin to see what all this prep is for?

Wanted it gone!

2010-01-21T18:39:00.000-08:00

Oh little one. About two months ago, I was wanting to get rid of your pacie. I talked to daddy about it and decided when you turned two it was going to go bye bye. I even talked to the doctor last week about how when you turn two that it is recommend for you to not have the pacie anymore.

Tuesday night you were laying in bed with daddy and me doing our nightly wind down routine. I wanted you to tell daddy something, so I tried to get your pacie out of your mouth and you wouldn't let it go. You were so determined to keep it, that you tore part of it off. I told daddy that there was no way you could sleep with a dangling pacie like that. We looked around the house for a spare, and we couldn't find one. We put you to bed that night with no pacie. It was so cute though. I went to rock you night night and you kept talking to me. You wouldn't stop talking. Finally, daddy put you night night. You did great with out the pacie that night! Well...little one....from that point on you have not had a pacie. You ask for it and we say "ALL GONE!"

I am so glad that getting rid of pacie hasn't been a hassle and that we were able to get rid of it before you were two!!! Yipppeeeeee!!!

Now what's on mommy's mind is trying to set you up for a big boy bed in the near future and even in the next six months or so starting to potty train!

Hostess

2009-12-25T05:41:00.000-08:00

We hosted our first family Holiday at our house yesterday. We had Christmas Eve with mimi, pop pop, grandma, auntie niece, uncle andy, auntie Angela, uncle John, uncle mike, auntie J, uncle J, auntie B, uncle E, parker, kent, uncle rich, erika, nico, gigi, and of course mommy, daddy, and you. We had beef, mostacholi, homemade cavetell, veggie casserole, chicke parm, and many appitizers and dessert including a candy buffet.

First we met with just my immediate family. Pop pop read the Christmas story as you, Parker, and Kent (well at times kent was eating chips at the table) sat on his lap. A great memory for me!

We had a great time and mommy did't want it to end. We tried to put on the Christmas play and pop pop played Joseph. It was so funny...pop pop was a great sport about it.

You little one love to play with your cousins. You don't actually play with them...you tackle them instead. You love it though.

I love how now that you are here and almost 2...what was our family traditions you are able to experience yourself.

Needed to read

2009-12-23T13:43:00.000-08:00

With change and transition most likely in our future, it was fitting for me to read this today....from crosswalk.com

The angel answered, "The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God. Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be barren is in her sixth month. For nothing is impossible with God." "I am the Lord's servant," Mary answered. "May it be to me as you have said." Then the angel left her.

As believers, we must learn the meaning of surrender. When God places a call on your life, there is no room for questions or hesitation. Is God calling you to some specific task? Are you willing to surrender all to obey Him? You must simply say, "I am the Lord's servant. May it be to me as you have said." Take with you the very valuable lessons of surrender, compassion, obedience, and love displayed in the Christmas story.

I want to be like Mary the mother of Jesus. Have the Lord ask me to do something and me be more than willing to do it.

Overload

2009-12-10T06:26:00.001-08:00

Too much on my mind and too much going on right now to be able to sort through and write any thoughts down.

Blurb

2009-11-26T04:45:00.000-08:00

My cup runneth over with blessings!

lower part of my body

2009-11-20T18:27:00.000-08:00

my feet always hurt...I wish I could hire someone to rub them for 1/2 right before bed. For sure then I would have a great night of sleep!

_________________ CHRISTMAS

2009-11-18T03:10:00.000-08:00

I received this email from a friend today. I thought I would post it on here. It made me sad to think how life is as a Christian now in today's world, and how much harder it will be for Blake to be a Christian in his schools as he gets older. I will for sure be saying Merry Christmas this season!

Twas the month before Christmas*
*When all through our land,*
*Not a Christian was praying*
*Nor taking a stand.*
*See the PC Police had taken away,*
*The reason for Christmas - no one could say.*
*The children were told by their schools not to sing,*
*About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.*
*It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would say*
* December 25th is just a ' Holiday '.*
*Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit*
*Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!*
*CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-pod*
*Something was changing, something quite odd! *
*Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa*
*In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.*
*As Targets were hanging their trees upside down*
* At Lowe's the word Christmas - was no where to be found.*
*At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears*
*You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.*
*Inclusive, sensitive, Di-ver-si-ty*
*Are words that were used to intimidate me.*
*Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen*
*On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton !*
*At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter*
*To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.*
*And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith*
* Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace*
*The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded*
*The reason for the season, stopped before it started.*
*So as you celebrate 'Winter Break' under your 'Dream Tree'*
*Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.*
*Choose your words carefully, choose what you say*
*Shout MERRY CHRISTMAS , not Happy Holiday !*

Duhhhhhhhh it's all about knowing Christ

2009-11-16T05:05:00.000-08:00

I try and workout weekly. It's more of a hassle when I am expecting my monthly visitor. I dreaded working out this past week, but in doing so would release some stress. I decided this past week when I was working out I would take along my Parent Magazine to help bypass the time. As I began to go on the PreCore, I took out the Parent Magazine and started to read it. I came across an article about Mothers and how to reduce their stress. I had a pretty tough week last week, so I was eager to read what they had suggested in this article. They listed two things in there that totally hit home to me and I realized, did I really need a secular magazine article to tell me how to reduce stress? The two things they listed were:
1) Go in your car and meditate by yourself = hmmmm might that be praying?
2) Always be thankful it helps take your mind off of what is going on
around you = isn't that scriptural ( 1 Thessalonians 5)

I was put into my place by realizing that when I am stressed to remember to still have my quiet time with the Lord to rejuvenate and refresh me and to have the mindset that there are so many things I have been blessed with and need to be thankful for. But then I also realize that a secular magazine was talking about the Lord and the Bible and they didn't even realize it. It saddened me but also gave me hope that maybe those who are wayward and reading this article maybe able to be turned back to the Lord and be reminded what they learned in the past and go back to that relationship with him.