So frustrated

There are some major things that need to be discussed about the baby and just no time or energy to have those deep conversations and then to make those decisions...ugh!

Oh man!

I had another doctor's appointment yesterday. The baby was monitored and looks healthy the doctor said. I was hooked up to a machine to check the heartbeat and movement of the baby. When the doctor came in to check me she asked if I had coughed at all during the time I was being monitored. I told her no, she said well you had a contraction in there. I didn't even know! She didn't say a braxton hicks contraction, she just said a contraction. I have three weeks until the baby turns....that is March 18th. She said if it doesn't turn after March 18th, most likely it won't turn.

I find myself praying not for it to turn and not for it to not turn...I find myself praying for God's will to happen. I don't know what would be best for me a c-section or normal birth...I am trusting whatever it is, it's what I can handle and what the Lord wants for me. I keep saying that, but I do have a peace about it. Either way, they both make me squirm. I just wish a baby could be born one push, no pain, and then born able to nurse right away with no problem.

I am getting anxious to know if it's a boy or a girl. My students yesterday wrote down the estimated date of when the baby will come and if it's a boy or girl. Everyone in class choose a boy except for two people.

My mom thinks it's a boy, Jason's mom when she saw me for the first time when I was pregnant said she thinks it's a boy. Bethany at the start said a girl...not sure what she says now...actually now she asks if they have my due date wrong because of how big I am.

I am anxious more than ever to know the gender.

Jason has been wonderful helping out. Running errands for the baby, putting things together for the baby, researching best products for the baby, rubbing my feet, grocery shopping, cleaning, and then simply being kind enough to ask how I am doing with the changes of not working and the baby coming.

My Saturday

So after I wrote my blog yesterday I had continual pain in my back. I really thought it was a pulled muscle or a UTI. I called the OB on call and he said to make sure everything is okay to go to the hospital and have them monitor me and do a urine test.

Jason was in Rockford and so he couldn't go with me. I am so blessed my mom lives five minutes from CDH(the hospital), so I picked her up on the way. We walked into Labor and Delivery. They checked me in...and they told me I had to take my clothes off. I wasn't too keen on that. But I did as I was told and I laid in the hospital bed as they checked the heartbeat and the movement of the baby.

The nurses at the hospital were wonderful. Very sweet, nurturing, and answered any and all questions. It was fun being in the hospital with my mom...we talked and she kept my mind off of what was going on.

The nurse came in and looked at the heartbeat and said that everything looks okay. She said that there is some irritability with the baby. That means when I don't drink enough I can have some contractions related to dehydration.

I then saw the doctor and he did an internal....I told him I didn't shave and I felt really bad. He just smiled. He said that I am not dilated or anything and am fully closed. He also mentioned the head is now at the top of my belly button. So the baby turned the opposite direction that it needs to turn.

My mom asked the doctor if I could deliver a little earlier...a couple days and he said no if we do a c-section we do it at 39 weeks. So I won't get to have Janna there for the birth...which I have to be okay with.

Next, I am feeling a little shame because I hadn't shaved for the doctor, he had to do an internal, and the nurse turns to me and whispers...honey next time you come in so you know, your gown opening goes in the back, not the front! I got so red! Oh my!

So that was my Saturday. Everything is good with the baby, no early labor, and the last thing the doctor said to me was...your 35 weeks, well honey you have awhile to go yet before the baby is born. So much for my thought that the baby would be born sometime in the 20's of March!

Finally the birds

I ran some errands at 7:45 this morning. As I pulled into the garage at 9:15 and was ready to shut the garage door, I notice birds chirping. I then sat on the couch waiting for the laundry to finish and could see the shadow of birds flying outside. Finally....life is starting to show....people and animals have come out of hibernation for a few days. Ugh...only to watch the news and see more snow headed here for Monday and Tuesday!



***side note...i feel as though the baby will be born sometime in the 20's of march...we'll see...we will know more in 3 weeks!

Do you know?

Do you know why it takes nine months to have a baby fully devloped? What was God's significance with 9 months?

question

When you are sick, what do you love doing and what makes you feel better?

Little one update

I went to the doctor on Wednesday. They said that the baby is still breech. At 37 weeks I have a decison to make if the baby hasn't turned. I can go to the hostiptal and they can try to turn the baby outside my body. The doctor said that if that is done there is not 100% success with it. It hurts the mother and can induce labor. 2nd option is to schedule a c-section at 39 weeks. So I think Jason and I are leaning towards the 2nd option.

I measured again at 34 weeks, but am 33 weeks. I keep feeling the baby's butt in my upper tummy! It makes me look uneven. Quite funny! I was told i can't travel anywhere more than an hour away.

I am trusting right now that God knows what I can and cannot handle. If it's a normal delivery, so be it. If it has to be a c-section, so be it. God has already planned out how my delivery is going to go, who my baby is, and has allowed Jason adn I the privilage to parent this child.

I am so glad that I have Jesus to trust and to have my best interest, Jason's best interest, and the baby's best interest in mind.

Now I have to decide when my last day at work will be. I am not sure what to do. I feel very tired when I am home from school. I went to bed....eyes closed...sleeping at 7:30 last night. I know I will leave around Easter break....not sure if I will a little before or if I will finsih the 4 day week after break.

Perfect

So I have been obviously gaining weight. I have gained ALOT of weight. I don't like the way that I look, but am okay with it. I know it doesn't last forever and when I can start to workout again, I WILL. Jason knows that I am not too keen on how much weight I have gained. Yesterday I went to go weigh myself...after not doing it for a week and on the scale was a post it note that said "PERFECT". He had written that so when I weighed myself he would know that I am perfect the way that I am. How sweet is that? Hugh...I am so glad I married this man and didn't give up on the hard times we had faced. I can't imagine living with another and going through a pregnancy with any other man. I can't wait for him to be a daddy in just 6 1/2 weeks! I go the dr. today, no ultrasound or anything, so there might not be too much to report back.

Baby Shower #3

I had my third baby shower yesterday. It was so much fun! There is a picture of me adn three other women. They were the ones responsible for throwing the shower. Cheryl, Cindy, and Leslie. They made it so special. Then there is a picture of another girl with the cake pan...she is who teaches third grade with me...Julie. Her mom made a yummy cake and decorated it for the shower. Then Julie headed up collecting money for my stroller and carseat. I loved it! I cried when I opened my stroller and carseat. I was so touched by that. Then they gave me a gift card to picture people in the mall. Others gave such thoughtful and generous gifts in addtion to the carseat and stroller. Sitting at the baby shower confirmed to me that I work at a wonderful school with such thoughtful adn caring staff members.

I then posted some pictures of the crib and bedding...Jason put together the crib in less than an hour...what a great husband and fixer of a man.

The picture that you see that is brown and white polka dots and green adn white striped is a picture I painted for the baby. I kept looking for some kind of art for the baby's room and couldn't find it, so I decided to paint one myself. My papa is going to paint a paisely one for the baby....can't wait!

Just a little bit about Rosie

My mother dearest....Rosie...I love my mother. I remember growing up I would get home from school and she would be on the phone praying with a friend. Or I would get home from school and she would be making a meal for someone who was sick. She sacrificed and did daycare in her home so she could be home when we all got back from school. When I would be sick, she would make me a bed on the couch with sheets, seven up, crackers, and a pillow. My mom would allow us to have fiends over anytime we wanted. Our house was alaways the "hangout" house. I remember my mom praying all the time, I would hear her praying in her room. It was and is still so important to my mom to make things so special. Like my wedding, my baby shower, exc. She would always praise me in school when I would get "C's". My friends loved Rosie and would often tell her things that I didn't even know about. Now that I am becoming a mother, there are many things I want to emulate from my mother. Nosie Rosie is an incredible mother and will be an incredible grandmother to my little precious baby.

Grandpa- Pop-Pop

I love my dad. He is such a hardworking man who really loves his family and does whatever it takes to provide. He is so willing to help out whenever he can. He has a great sense of humor and when I was younger he gave such great insight. He is handy around the house and my friends always liked "sir" or "Mr. Vern". I am glad that Jesus choose me to be his daughter and him to be my dad. I can't wait for the baby to meet him. It is the best feeling when someone tells me they love my dad and how much fun he is. It shows that he touches lives outside the family. I love my dad!

Baby shower #2

Oh my goodness! I loved the shower my family threw for me. It was done with such creativity and precious planning. I loved the colors...which were teal, green or a turqoise, orange, pink, and some other bright happy colors. There was a table cloth that was striped with plates that were to act as polka dots. I LOVED the food. Bethany and I think my mom came up with the idea of Panera Experiance. It was bread bowls with three types of soups: minestrone, potato, and chicken noodle. Then they had three salads catered: Chicken Ceaser, Tuscan Harvest (my favorite), and Chopped Salad, and then a big fruit bowl. For dessert they had my favorite cake from Jewel....that was a marbel cake and the best frosting ever! The cake read "Bundle of Blessing" The cake was decorated to make the polka dots and then a special touch from Bethany with dots on the bottom of the cake. They had two types of cookies with lemon bars and a dessert.

The event started off with Bethany asking everyone to sit down three times. Then auntie Denise and auntie Pam read a poem and devotion.

We ate and talked and visited. While we ate, Bethany asked for the person who had the longest labor, biggest baby, and smallest baby to raise their hand and they were given a prize.

Then we opened gifts....we were truely blessed once again by everyone's generosity. After gifts we had dessert and visited some more.

I realized through talking with my sister that everyone had a part in the shower:
grandma bought the cake, cousins and aunts helped with making soup and putting together the tulip center pieces. I also realized that everyone in the room for our shower was there for Jason and I during our hard time in our marriage, and there they sat now celebrating with us not only the mircle of our marriage but also the blessing of a child...they were celebrating with us something happy and joyous.

I loved my shower...I know that my mom and bethany sacrifced time, money, and energy to make it so special. I was so blessed to be able to say my mom and sister cordinated everything....I couldn't have honestly asked for a better shower.

As Bethany was driving me home I thought, oh it's over...how sad...I had so much fun and loved the decorations and theme that it was sad to think now it's just a memory.

Well, we are on now to talking about how to plan Janna's wedding shower!

Excitement and being uncomfortable

Okay so last night, Jason put together our crib. It looks wonderful. I love it! Then I couldn't sleep last night partially because I was very uncomfortable and then partially because I was excited about my baby shower today and crib. Well I woke up this morning at 5:00 laid in bed and got up at 6:50. I went downstairs and turned off the outside light. As I turned off the light, I saw a box outside our door....it was our crib bedding. I was so excited! I took it out of the package adn put in on the bed. Jason's mom and sister are coming today so they can see it. My parents and papa and sister are coming over today and tomorrow so they will be able to see it. I have to take everything off and wash it and iron it, but I love how it looks with the crib. I will post pictures of the bedding, crib, dresser, and my second baby shower soon. Gosh...God is so good and has blessed so much!

Good and Bad

I am excited to say that school was cancelled to due to the 8 inches of snow that we have recived already. I totally could use a day off, kind of sad when we just had one off about two weeks ago. I did bring school work home with me to do, maybe about 3 hours worth and then some. I had a feeling we weren't going to have school. So that is the good news.

The bad news is today was suppose to be my work baby shower. I feel bad for those who had planned the shower and they were so excited about it. I know though they too could use a day off of school, so it is a blessing for them also.

Well, I am off to drink my morning decaf of Jo.