Thursday, December 27, 2007
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
Monday, December 24, 2007
Saturday, December 22, 2007
I am very frustrated, upset, and hurt. I haven't cried as much as I have cried this week than I have in a long time. Some may say its hormones...I am wishing I could blame it on that, but I can't blame it on pregnancy.
I hope I can look past circumstances and feel something different in the days to come.
Thursday, December 20, 2007
I just don't wanna go to work though. I am so tired....so worn out...so many things to do...that I don't wanna go to work.
I know I have two weeks off of school after Friday, but it would be nice to have a day off work prior to Christmas so that I can clean and get grocery shopping done.
Oh well....I keep trying to savor the moments I have left with my students. Only about 50 days left after Christmas break and I know I am going to miss them and teaching in general.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
"Now, O Lord my God, you have made your servant king in place of my father David. But I am only a little child and do not know how to carry out my duties. Your servant is here among the people you have chosen, a great people to numerous to count or number. So give your servant a discerning heart to govern your people and to distinguish between right and wrong." The Lord was pleased that Solomon had asked for this. So God said "Since you have asked for this and not wealth and long life, nor have asked for death of your enemies but for discernment in administering justice. I will do what you have asked and give you a wise and discerning heart.....Moreover, I will give you what you have not asked for both riches and honor.
I love how Solomon was a young boy who had his priorities straight. He didn't want material things, he asked for wisdom and discerning heart. He was given much at a young age and the Lord trusted him to be a leader.
1 Kings 4: 29
God gave Solomon wisdom and very great insight.
Be careful to obey all the laws Moses has given you; do not turn from it to the right or the left, that you may be successful wherever you go. (9) Be strong and courageous. Do not be terrified; do not be discouraged, For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
I want this precious baby to keep God's laws in his heart and to follow his path and like it says to be successful wherever it goes. That this life in me would be strong, courageous, and not have any fear in whatever life brings him/her.
I hope I can keep this up to read this to the baby everyday. It's great to read it stories and rhymes, but how much better is it to read it scripture and pray for these things that I am reading.
During the party, a few moms came in to say Happy Birthday. I loved it because we were able to talk about life, changes of being a mom, and just have an adult conversation apart from school and work. It was wonderful!
After the party, I went up to the room mom who did most of the work for my birthday, and told her how much I appreciated her doing this for me. She said that she knows I probably won't return next year and really wanted me to have something special. I was so blessed by her sincerity of giving and thoughtfulness.
I am sad because I know that I will miss these times...not the gifts, but interacting with adults and seeing the students get so excited.
Saturday, December 15, 2007
Friday, December 14, 2007
I celebrated St. Lucia day with my parents, jason, rich, and papa. My mom made yummy homemade swedish meatballs and noodles. It was soo good! Then I served a peppermint choc. cake my mom made to everyone with a wreath on my head! Jason thought I looked cute...I thought...hmmm interesting tradition..but it was fun...we laughed, ate, and enjoyed one another's company.
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Monday, December 10, 2007
Friday, December 7, 2007
I hope when my baby comes I can still be a kid. I had a little girl over the other day to help make some Christmas cookies. She is one of my students. We had such a fun time. When we heard Jason come home, we hid in the closet and yelled surprise. It was great...she was giggling the whole time. I hope I can be a fun mom!
This picture was taken over Thanksgiving break.
Janna looks really small in the picture.....I look like a big head and smile! Yikes...bethany was sweet enough to write a comment on facebook asking what would I do if my child looked like me in this picture....
Wednesday, December 5, 2007
A friend came to my classroom yesterday and told me she was pregnant. I was so happy for her. Now four more friends....need that same blessing!
I am rereading a very good book right now. When I Lay My Issac Down. I will have to write some excerpts from it sometime.
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
I go back to the doctor tonight (in this lovely weather). It's just a check up....and hopefully will get a good report.
I have made two kinds of Christmas cookies....snowballs and pecan tassies. I want to make maybe two more kinds...we'll see how I am feeling. I was in bed by 7:30 last night and lights off by 8:00...making cookies and working a full day made me REALLY tired.
Sunday, December 2, 2007
It's so scary. I had heard months 6-9 or harder to be pregnant in and you get more uncomfortable. I can say that is starting to be true here. My back hurts more and my feet and hands are swollen, I get out of breath alot easier, and I even got dizzy during church on Thanksgiving and had to leave service.
This past week, I have been up every night in the middle of the night for an hour. The baby wasn't active this week and I was a bit concerned. I laid in the bed praying for an hour that the baby would give me just one kick to let me know it's alive. It would. What a comfort in a kick. People say oh, just wait. It will be kicking all the time! Last night the baby kicked quite a bit. Jason was able to feel it twice! He had the BIGGESTS grin on his face when he felt the baby move. His mom was able to feel it move over Thankgiving...so she had her first introduction with the precious baby in my belly.
I need to make some Christmas cookies. The thought of being on my feet again just doesn't seem appealing. I know I can bring the ingrediants and utencils to me and make them at the table. But then I have to get up, wash the untencils and be up and down to put the cookies and them out of the oven. I love to bake, but just doesn't seem to appealing right now.
What in the world????? Why do I have so much to say at 3:45 in the morning?
I am going to go back upstairs and hold Jason's hand untill I fall asleep. I tend to do that. WHen I can't sleep, I will hold his hand. He says he likes it when I hold his hand during the night. He doesn't know I am doing it, but he says he likes it!
Saturday, December 1, 2007
Thursday, November 29, 2007
Thursday, November 22, 2007
Later that evening, Jason and I were at home resting in bed and I felt the baby move again. It was a little more of harder kick than what it had been for my mom and Janna. I grabbed Jason's had and he felt the baby three times. Jason talked to the baby and gave it a high five back.
I loved seeing the interaction of the baby with those it will be meeting in the next few months. It was so meaningful to me.
*I gained five inches in my chest since I became pregnant (hopefully I won't gain too much more)and I had another dream I had a boy.
Monday, November 19, 2007
I love this song by Shane and Shane:
When I think about the Lord how he saved me
how he raised me how he filled me with the holy ghost
how he healed me to the uttermost.
When I think about the Lord makes me wanna shout...
Thursday, November 15, 2007
1) To reflect God's love
2) To build confidence in our child
In all we do and all we say whether it's to our child or to one another Jason and I need to make sure that those things are reflecting God's love and building confidence in them.
We are going to try to go through 10 sessions on how to be a better parent, and also to make sure we agree on parenting styles. We know there is no manual and we know you do best when you are actually in the situation. We also know that we need to make sure we are on the same page with expectations, discipline, communication, exec. I am excited to go through these sessions, yet I realize wow, what a responsibility!
Tuesday, November 13, 2007
Today at my appointment they will be looking at the internal organs of the baby, the placenta, and to see if my hehomorage is gone. Please pray that the Lord would let all those things look "healthy and wonderful"
One more prayer request for the rest of my pregnancy is about the dr. that delivers my baby. I had a not fun experience a month ago with a dr. and I don't want that dr. to deliver my child. My normal dr told me yesterday that there is no control over that. Whoever delivers the baby I have no control over. So Jason and I are praying that the Lord will put whoever needs to deliver my baby with me on that day. That he would handpick someone for me that I would need who is gentle, kind, compassionate, and understanding, and then whoever the baby would need to have a safe delivery ....I am trusting the Lord to be faithful.
I haved some pics to post...not many of a wedding and two of my weekend in AL/MISS. I will post those with the results of the ultrasound.
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
I have a question:
When do you use me and I. For example....would you say Jason and me or Jason and I? I am getting a bit confused. In school I learned it should be Jason and I, but lately I have noticed people doing Jason and me.
Monday, November 5, 2007
Also...I was getting ready yesterday and I thought of something that I found so neat. I thought that Jesus is the ONLY person right now who knows that my baby is a boy or a girl. I found that so comforting. Then I thought just like he is the only one that knows if my baby is a boy or a girl, he is also the only one that knows if we will sell our home or not, he is the only one that knows how my delivery will go, and he is the only one that knows what day the baby will be born on. Hmmmm........ even though I don't know alot of the outcomes of the next 6 months, the person who does is the one who has my best interest in mind and the only person who I would want to control the future for me.
Monday, October 29, 2007
My Papa called last week and told Jason and I that "We want to buy the baby's crib" I was so touched by that. We meaning Nana, who has passed and then my Papa who is still living. I love how my Papa is sentimental about big miles stones and wants us grandchildren to never forget Nana or himself. Papa has instilled great values for us kids and has left fingerprints of himself and the Lord upon our lives. He has been a great example of how a man should treat his wife with serving in unconditional love. Papa was not only a grandpa, he was a coach, and one of our biggest fans when we played sports. I can't wait for my little baby to meet Papa!
Saturday, October 27, 2007
Monday, October 22, 2007
1) I want to start a buisness called Friend For A Day and be a friend to all the lonely people in the world.
2) I love olives
3) I love talking with older women
4) I had my eye on Jason even before we ever met
5) I love snowstorms when I know no one can leave their house (that means everyone is safe)
6) I do not want to live in a huge house
7) Growing up I wanted to be a Pastor's wife, a radio DJ, a chef, and a hair dresser.
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
I had a dream on October 17th that I had a baby boy. I dreamed that he had my color hair and blue eyes. We took him home and I tried to feed him and he didn't eat much at all. He wore a blue tight hat on his head and I remember thinking the shape of his head is beautiful. Jason then told me I had to have a c-section. I remember being tired and crying alot because I was in so much pain and couldn't hold the baby. Hmmmm I wonder if any part of this dream will come true????!!!
1) Living through a world war and I can't imagine that
2) Jesus coming back...which am I ready for...yes, but still have things that I want to accomplish here on earth.
When I think of Heaven it overwhelms me. When I think of how long eternity is it hurts my head. When I think of being in Heaven and not kissing my husband and having him hold me, it hurts me. When I think of how we will worship Jesus and see him face to face it is unfathamable.
Is it okay to have mixed emotions about Heaven?
Monday, October 15, 2007
Saturday, October 13, 2007
Friday, October 12, 2007
Oct. 19th-21st my roommate is coming in
Oct. 24th- meeting with some parents after school
Oct. 25th- start parent teacher conferences
Oct. 26th-Pumpkin Day at school (crazy busy day)
Oct. 26th-28th- Pekin for Jason's dad's birthday and spend time with his family
Oct. 29-Oct. 31st- More Parent Teacher conferences
Nov. 2nd-4th- Brenda's wedding rehearsal, wedding, and small group
Nov. 8th-Nov. 11th- Flying to AL to see a football game and the Orcutts
Nov. 12th- Dr. appointment
Nov. 13th- Hospital to get my ultrasound
Nov. 21-25th- Thanksgiving holiday festivities.
Oh my....that is just what is planned ahead of time. Man...life is busy, but I do know that I will hopefully have unforeseen rest in there.
I guess time flies when you are busy!
Monday, October 8, 2007
I called Jason really upset after that appointment, and he called the Dr. office and complained. The operator there offered to call the doctor I met with and have him call me back, but he had "already" left the office.....does that prove that he was in a rush or what? I ended up telling the operator lady that I didn't like that doctor and do not want to call him so she said she will have my normal doctor call me tomorrow. Ugh...just totally frustrating for me!
The latest news is that the heartbeat was at 140 and I gained two pounds in 3 weeks. The total of 3 min. the doctor was in the room with me, he felt my uterus and it is growing as it should be. I go back in a month to see the Dr and around that same time will have another ultrasound.
I am praying that the next time I go in for the ultrasound, the baby looks okay and there is no
Sunday, October 7, 2007
When church ended we went to breakfast, stopped by my parents (I had to go potty bad), and then went shopping and driving to look at houses. Jason helped me pick out my first two pair of maternity pants. A black pair from motherhood and a pair of jeans from gap. We had a great day together and I savored every moment not wanting it to end.
I am thankful my husband wants to spend time with me and was willing to give up his baseball and football games so we can enjoy one anothers company. In less than six months it will be the three of us...right now I am going to hog him all I can!
Friday, October 5, 2007
We took a personality test and my personality was labeled as Steadiness. Basically it described me almost to a t.
It said I am loyal, I am driven by relationships, I do whatever it takes to keep harmony, I do not like change, I do not like conflict.
Things I need to improve on is: more assertive, be less sensitive, be more positive towards change, appreciate other's ideas...and there was so much more to it.
I didn't really learn anything about myself that was new...the exciting thing is that I saw that I really knew who Sharon was.
I guess I had worried that I would have a baby and not know who I was as person, sitting in that lecture showed me...I know who I am, and I like who I am, Yet I need to improve who I am too.
Wednesday, October 3, 2007
I pray for those I know going through something where life isn't fair right now. That God would show them his love and grace through this time. That he would put a peace in their hearts to know that he has the outcome under control. I pray that these people would try not to understand the situation, but trust Christ's sovereignty.
Monday, October 1, 2007
Proverbs 13: 24
If you refuse to discipline your son, it proves you don't love him; for if you love him you will be prompt to punish him.
Saturday, September 29, 2007
Friday, September 28, 2007
We had another showing on our house...still no news. We have had about 4 or 5 showings in the last couple weeks, but no offers. I am getting nervous. I want to move soon so that I can help pack and unpack.
Jason is so confident that God has it all under control. He knows the house we need to move in, knows the neighbors we need to have, knows the school the children will need to be in, knows the offer we need on this current house...he's just so confident. I wish I could be more like that, but right now I am more anxious than confident.
My sister called today and told me a plan for all that i need to do for the baby according to what month I am in. She mentioned registering and going to check out the hospital we will deliver at. Wow...to me that is serious stuff.
I ordered Fit Pregnancy Magazine I could work out while pregnant, unfortunately I can't. But seeing all the little babies in there just can't wait to hold my own. I already love babies and kids, and to be able to have my own that is from me own body and DNA and Jason's is amazing.
My face is getting worse. I feel like I wouldn't mind how I look at 14 weeks pregnant, but my face is just NASTY!
It's crazy during the school day having other students that are not mine, come up and ask if I am pregnant or as the younger kids ask "is there a baby in your belly?" I love having to say yes!
I can't help but constantly think through out my day what a true honor it is that the Lord has blessed me with a child. I know as soon as I found out I was pregnant, I dropped to the ground, cried, and thanked the Lord for choosing us to parent this life!
Once again, Lord, thank you for this gift of life in me. May I trust you as I worry and think about my fears of loosing this child during pregnancy or the baby having health issues. Let me trust be louder than my fears!
Thursday, September 27, 2007
He also gave the nurse roses for taking care of him...they were peach roses....
I can't help but have my mind wonder.....is there a hidden meaning behind the pink roses.
I think I am totally reading way too far into it!
Tuesday, September 25, 2007
Side note....the dr. called and said I am still hemorrhaging in my uterus. Please pray that the hemorrhage resolves. They said they are going to monitor it.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
I think the funniest part of the wedding was towards the end. My grandma loves to dance! She really can move and grove. She asked me if I would dance, and I said I was too tired to tonight. So I pulled her aside and told her to ask Jason to dance. She was so excited...she asked Okay, what kind of song, fast, slow? She was really looking forward to dancing with him. I told her a fast song, that Jason is good at dancing on fast ones. So as soon as a fast song came, grandma Bea danced her little body and grabbed Jason on the dance floor. Oh I was laughing so hard! I went and sat by all my cousins (8 or 9 of us) we were watching Jason and grandma dance. She was going to town!!!! All of a sudden I look and I see Jason standing there looking all around. Grandma was shaking her grove thing and started dancing everywhere else on the dance floor but next to Jason. Jason was looking right to left and couldn't find grandma. He then found me and came and sat by me and said....your grandma left me on the dance floor. Grandma can't control herself when there is music on....she's gotta shake her grove thing...if if that means she leaves her dancing partner standing there. Oh I was just laughing so hard! My husband is such a good sport! He danced so well and was out there without me...he is the bestest!
This was the first time grandparents and aunts and extended cousins saw me since we have been pregnant. Lots of belly touching, hugs, and congrats! Again, it is a realization that we are really having a baby in 6 months!
Saturday, September 22, 2007
How much time are you suppose to arrive before your dr. appointment?
When is it the right time to go register for your baby?
How much time should you allow yourself to cool off after an argument?
Is there such a thing as spending too much time with your husband?
How many times will people change their mind in thinking what the sex of my baby is?
Will there ever be a time when the Cubs win the world series?
T = Totally looking forward to something
I= I can't take my eyes off of the clock
M=Makes me so anxious
E=Every time I look forward to the time of something I miss out on the here and now!
Friday, September 21, 2007
The heartbeat measured at 163. Every time I call and tell Bethany something about the baby, she always changes what she thinks the sex is. It's so funny!
When Jason got home, I showed him the new images of the precious baby in my belly. I had put the first ultrasound picture we had in August at the top of the stack. The first one of the baby looked like a lima bean. So Jason looked at the picture and said it didn't change much. Then he shuffled to the next picture and a huge smile came on his face. I hit him in excitement and said, "Look that's our baby!" He was kind of quiet and studied the pictures. I asked what he was thinking, and he said...we created this life...how weird. We both were so excited about the growth of that little one
For me this appointment made me so excited and anxious. At every appointment I have been at I think we are at like 6 or something. But every one I have been at, there has always been a but in it. I see the baby but....the heartbeat is low. So today for the first time there was no buts about it!
I went to my mom and dads house and showed them and Janna the picture of the baby. My mom said that she thinks she saw a pee pee...meaning it's a boy! My dad looked at it and said...so that's my little granddaughter there. Janna was just in awe that the baby was in me like that.
Well now we are waiting to hear from the dr. with details about the baby. The technician couldn't read the ultrasound in depth. Hopefully I will hear from my doctor early this morning so I could send home a note to parents and students telling them of this awesome gift the Lord has blessed Jason and I with.
Lord, you are amazing. Seeing that life in me today was incredible. I don't know why you choose to bless Jason and I so quickly with a precious life. I thank you for your generosity and love towards us. As I sat this morning laying in bed a verse came into my mind
Every good and perfect gift comes from above!
Lord this baby you have given me is perfect and I know this life is yours first! Ugh I can't wait to see this baby...I AM SO EXCITED!!!
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
It was picture day today and one little girl didn't want to come in class because she was wearing a dress. She said that people were going to stare at her and make fun of her. She was crying and I went in the hallway and talked with her. I told her I would walk in class with her. I put out my hand so we can walk into class together, but with tears streaming down her face she refused.
***** It hit me that at the age of 8 this little girl was so self conscious about what others think of her.
Then there was this boy standing outside and he looks at me and says "Mrs. Sidell, Why is it all dry around your face?"
He was pointing out the pimples and dryness on my face because of my pregnancy. I couldn't tell him it was because I was pregnant, I just told him : "I don't know why, it just started happening. It has never been like this before."
I was already self conscious about my face, and it proves that other people see it too. Kids...they notice so many things that I never would think they would care about or think twice about.
Monday, September 17, 2007
Sunday, September 16, 2007
Friday, September 14, 2007
The ups and downs of my pregnancy are so hard
It has been so challenging for me to enjoy this life that you have planted in me.
I want to rejoice with the baby you have entrusted to Jason and I.
How do I do that Lord when there are so many uncertainties and complications with my pregnancy?
Thursday, September 13, 2007
The poor dr. I had. I had a list of questions I needed answered. He told me to take these otc pills to help go potty, he then suggested purpose soap for my face, and still said no exercise or intimacy for me.
After my appointment, I was so hungry. Jason and I went to Rock Bottom and I ate my plate CLEAN. All that was left on it was an edge piece of lettuce. I had a big cheeseburger with fries. Oh my was it sooooooo goood! I can't remember the last time I had a cheeseburger. Ugh..yummy! I think the baby really enjoyed it too.....I think it will want another one next week.
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
and sometimes tried to be a baller
She would leave me in a middle of a game
and she often would yell at me when I would look at her and want to dress the same
We would pull eachother hair and fight
and she would make fun of me cause I had to sleep with the light
We would talk spanish in bed
I couldn't hang out with her friends she said
Now we are best friends
and maternity clothes she freely lends
She make fun of me for writing a poem
but her and I will always be welcomed at one anothers home
She is one I confide in
and when I am down I can count on her to give me a grin
I bet she will add to this little diddy
and think she is so funny adn giddy
Oh Bethany she is older than me
but sisters and best friends we will always be.
Seek Jesus Himself.
So when I pray and ask for peace, wisdom, compassion, and holiness, is that part of seeking him?
Why does it seem when I pray it's for certain things?
Can't it just be seeking the face and heart of God? What would that look like or sound like? How would my prayers have to change?
In Oswald Chambers Book, but quote by F. Brook:
My goal is God Himself, not joy, nor peace; nor even blessing, but Himself, my God.
Saturday, September 8, 2007
You live a womb that is round and squishy like jelly
You cause my face to have many zits
you make me smell, that is my pits
My chest has been growing
people say my face is glowing
I love you so much already
and so does your proud daddy
You are only three months old
and soon you will be born when it is cold
Mommy thinks you are a precious gift
and she hopes her pregnancy goes by really swift
Each day we pray for you
and can't wait to hold you and see you coo
Friday, September 7, 2007
Jason has been such a wonderful husband during my pregnancy. Ever since we found out, to having all the ultrasounds and the fear of miscarriage, he has been so supportive. He has cleaned, done laundry, and grocery shopped for me. On top of all that he has gassed up my car and got my oil changed. He has not done this only once, but several times. He is making sure I am resting, and always checking what I am eating. When we go to bed we give one another a kiss good night, and he says "I love you, I love the two of you" I can't wait to see Jason hold our precious little baby in my belly in 29 weeks. He will be a great dad!
Thank you Lord that when I questioned and doubted you, you knew it all, you knew all that we would endure and you knew that you would carry us through. You knew Lord that I would need a supportive husband during my pregnancy and you allowed it to be Jason. I am so grateful for you seeing the end in sight when I didn't! I thank you Lord that you gave me strength during the hard times and your grace helped me to hang on to your promises. Thank you Lord for blessing me far more than I could ask or imagine! (ephes. 3:19-20)
Thursday, September 6, 2007
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
The purpose of prayer is to reveal the presance of God.
We generally look upon prayer as means of getting things for ourselves, whereas the Bible's idea of prayer is that God's holiness and God's purose and God's wise order be brought about.
There are times when we pray that things remain the same, but you begin to be different.
Monday, September 3, 2007
Gosh, so many things on my mind as I start to blog. I guess I will keep it sweet and simple. There will be some major life changes in the next 7 months and we can't wait!
One question I have....does the precious baby in my belly love me already and love me as much as I love it without having met me?
My name is Sharon. My sister has begged me to start up a "Blogspot" for some time now. There are some exciting things happening in our lives, and I'd like to keep a log of all of the adventures and changes that will be taking place. I love my husband, Jason. He watches Food Network with me, lets me go to the outlet malls 10x a week, and takes care of me when I'm sick.