Hostess

We hosted our first family Holiday at our house yesterday. We had Christmas Eve with mimi, pop pop, grandma, auntie niece, uncle andy, auntie Angela, uncle John, uncle mike, auntie J, uncle J, auntie B, uncle E, parker, kent, uncle rich, erika, nico, gigi, and of course mommy, daddy, and you. We had beef, mostacholi, homemade cavetell, veggie casserole, chicke parm, and many appitizers and dessert including a candy buffet.

First we met with just my immediate family. Pop pop read the Christmas story as you, Parker, and Kent (well at times kent was eating chips at the table) sat on his lap. A great memory for me!

We had a great time and mommy did't want it to end. We tried to put on the Christmas play and pop pop played Joseph. It was so funny...pop pop was a great sport about it.

You little one love to play with your cousins. You don't actually play with them...you tackle them instead. You love it though.

I love how now that you are here and almost 2...what was our family traditions you are able to experience yourself.

Needed to read

With change and transition most likely in our future, it was fitting for me to read this today....from crosswalk.com

The angel answered, "The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the holy one to be born will be called the Son of God. Even Elizabeth your relative is going to have a child in her old age, and she who was said to be barren is in her sixth month. For nothing is impossible with God." "I am the Lord's servant," Mary answered. "May it be to me as you have said." Then the angel left her.

As believers, we must learn the meaning of surrender. When God places a call on your life, there is no room for questions or hesitation. Is God calling you to some specific task? Are you willing to surrender all to obey Him? You must simply say, "I am the Lord's servant. May it be to me as you have said." Take with you the very valuable lessons of surrender, compassion, obedience, and love displayed in the Christmas story.

I want to be like Mary the mother of Jesus. Have the Lord ask me to do something and me be more than willing to do it.

Overload

Too much on my mind and too much going on right now to be able to sort through and write any thoughts down.

Blurb

My cup runneth over with blessings!

lower part of my body

my feet always hurt...I wish I could hire someone to rub them for 1/2 right before bed. For sure then I would have a great night of sleep!

_________________ CHRISTMAS

I received this email from a friend today. I thought I would post it on here. It made me sad to think how life is as a Christian now in today's world, and how much harder it will be for Blake to be a Christian in his schools as he gets older. I will for sure be saying Merry Christmas this season!

Twas the month before Christmas*
*When all through our land,*
*Not a Christian was praying*
*Nor taking a stand.*
*See the PC Police had taken away,*
*The reason for Christmas - no one could say.*
*The children were told by their schools not to sing,*
*About Shepherds and Wise Men and Angels and things.*
*It might hurt people's feelings, the teachers would say*
* December 25th is just a ' Holiday '.*
*Yet the shoppers were ready with cash, checks and credit*
*Pushing folks down to the floor just to get it!*
*CDs from Madonna, an X BOX, an I-pod*
*Something was changing, something quite odd! *
*Retailers promoted Ramadan and Kwanzaa*
*In hopes to sell books by Franken & Fonda.*
*As Targets were hanging their trees upside down*
* At Lowe's the word Christmas - was no where to be found.*
*At K-Mart and Staples and Penny's and Sears*
*You won't hear the word Christmas; it won't touch your ears.*
*Inclusive, sensitive, Di-ver-si-ty*
*Are words that were used to intimidate me.*
*Now Daschle, Now Darden, Now Sharpton, Wolf Blitzen*
*On Boxer, on Rather, on Kerry, on Clinton !*
*At the top of the Senate, there arose such a clatter*
*To eliminate Jesus, in all public matter.*
*And we spoke not a word, as they took away our faith*
* Forbidden to speak of salvation and grace*
*The true Gift of Christmas was exchanged and discarded*
*The reason for the season, stopped before it started.*
*So as you celebrate 'Winter Break' under your 'Dream Tree'*
*Sipping your Starbucks, listen to me.*
*Choose your words carefully, choose what you say*
*Shout MERRY CHRISTMAS , not Happy Holiday !*

Duhhhhhhhh it's all about knowing Christ

I try and workout weekly. It's more of a hassle when I am expecting my monthly visitor. I dreaded working out this past week, but in doing so would release some stress. I decided this past week when I was working out I would take along my Parent Magazine to help bypass the time. As I began to go on the PreCore, I took out the Parent Magazine and started to read it. I came across an article about Mothers and how to reduce their stress. I had a pretty tough week last week, so I was eager to read what they had suggested in this article. They listed two things in there that totally hit home to me and I realized, did I really need a secular magazine article to tell me how to reduce stress? The two things they listed were:
1) Go in your car and meditate by yourself = hmmmm might that be praying?
2) Always be thankful it helps take your mind off of what is going on
around you = isn't that scriptural ( 1 Thessalonians 5)

I was put into my place by realizing that when I am stressed to remember to still have my quiet time with the Lord to rejuvenate and refresh me and to have the mindset that there are so many things I have been blessed with and need to be thankful for. But then I also realize that a secular magazine was talking about the Lord and the Bible and they didn't even realize it. It saddened me but also gave me hope that maybe those who are wayward and reading this article maybe able to be turned back to the Lord and be reminded what they learned in the past and go back to that relationship with him.

Isaiah 35:3...read this and reminded me of how to encourage and pray for Jason.

It says :(New International Version)

Strengthen the feeble hands,
steady the knees that give way

So now what in action would help me to accomplish that verse besides praying for him daily....hmmmm not sure but need to think about that.

Champ

Oh yesterday Blake did awesome when he got his tubes in. I woke him up at 5:45 am and got him ready. While daddy got ready we watched Jon and Kate on TLC. He loves kids, so watching that clan on TV was very entertaining to him. He was running around the house while we were gathering snacks for him that he could have after his surgery.

We got to CDH at 6:35 am. Blake was running around the office in the waiting room saying hi to everyone. At this waiting room, they actually had kids toys, book, and even Nintendo.

Finally they called us back to the room for Blake to be weighed and measured. He had bear in his hands and was running into the room and was just so happy. Never would have known he woke up 2 1/2 hours earlier than normal.

They lady then led us into the room where she took out the cutest yellow garmets Blake had to wear. They were little yellow pants and a yellow shirt that fit him perfect. Once Blake was changed, she began to check his vitals. He did awesome once again while they checked his pulse, blood pressure, and lungs. I think he loves when it gets done. He sits there patiently and then looks up and smiles at the nurse.

When we finished our vital check, the nurse pulled out several papers I needed to sign and review. As I was doing that, Blake wasn't too keen on waiting, so Jason got a HUGE red wagon...not a typical radio flyer wagon, but HUGE wagon. He began toting Blake around the hospital...the nurses saw and decided Blake needed a pillow and a blanket in the wagon. Oh was Blake ever so proud. Grinning from ear to ear as daddy wheeled him around. He would greet those in their rooms and then the nurses at the nurse station. He was so happy! Soon he decided daddy was done wheeling him around and he was going to pull bear around in the wagon. I just will never forget the grin on his face when he was pretending like he was the mayor and greeter for all the hospital workers and guests.

After waiting about 45 min for the anesthesiologist and dr. Blake was given some happy juice. It helped him with his separation anxiety and not to freak out when they put a mask over his face. He took the medicine like a pro and began to get really loopy. He was dazing out and couldn't walk on his own, he would start to tip over. It was the only time I thought I might cry seeing how that medicine affected him, but I knew it would help him and not harm him.

Shortly after the nurses, anesthesiologist, and dr came in several times to see if we had questions and to tell us they would take extra care of Blake.

The nurse took Blake away at 8:17 and then at 8:28 they came and told us that the procedure was done. That he did phenomenal and didn't cry once. He did fine when the mask was put on him, breathed a couple deep breaths, and fell asleep. They said it would take 20 min for him to wake up. Shortly after we heard two nurses say "isn't he adorable"...i jumped up turned to Jason and said...Blake is here...Blake is done! Sure enough he was wheeled in on his little hospital crib and was stretching and out came the word "mama". The nurse said that was the first word he said when he woke up! Touched my heart!!!

He looked so adorable in the hospital bed in his yellow pj's holding his bear. He was so relaxed when he was wheeled in to us.

The nurse told us to expect Blake to scream, cry, yell, and to arch his back. During that time when we were warned that Blake could react that way they assured us it was normal and the screaming and crying doesn't phase them.

Blake woke up and sat in daddy's arms and had cheerios and apple juice. Five min had passed I looked a Jason, and asked when is he suppose to scream and arch his back...????? Jason told me it should have happened already, and Blake just didn't react that way like most kids do after this type of surgery.

I was relived. The nurse kept saying how great Blake had done through out the whole surgery and before hand. I was so happy! I know my son did awesome and that he was a champ through the whole thing, but I also know that there were so many praying for us and that made the difference as well. All the texts and phone calls meant so much to me!! We were blessed to have such a wonderufl support system. Having been through a surgery with a little one now helps me to know how to pray more specifically for those who are having to go through one with their little one as well.

OH little one

you are too much for your mommy and daddy! too cute for us, but we don't mind. Today I was rocking you and you kept saying, "set GO!" and would like jerk your body like you are getting ready to spring somewhere. I asked you while I was rocking you what song you wanted me to sing, and the last several nights you have asked for "To You (happy birthday)!" Crazy how much you love the happy birthday song. You have started to read books more and sit and watch TV for 10min straight. You love to color and play with play dough, although mommy and daddy have to take it away every time because you put it in your mouth. You are to much for mommy and daddy because you are too cute and amaze us everyday!

Italy brought to us

I am fortunate enough to be over 50% Italian. I have a grandma Bea who cooks amazing Italian food. Sundays growing up we would go to her house for pasta and homemade sauce and big meatballs. I can't even explain to you the smell of her house when we walked it. Her pasta sauce and meatballs beat any reasturant. Still to this day I crave her food. Today I went to go see my grandpa all by myself. It's Sunday, so of course she made her pasta sauce and meatballs. Grandma insisted I bring home some pasta for Jason and Blake. Jason ate it up super fast and Blake had his first taste of grandma Bea's pasta. He gobbled it up like a turkey. Stuffing both hands in his mouth eating it as fast as he could. Several times Jason and I had to tell him to slow down. It's so awesome that Blake is able to taste what I grew up on and be blessed with that great Italian cooking!

side note: we took blake's highschair down yesterday and now he just sits in a normal chair for eating....such a big boy!

Waiting....we all are waiting for something

Heard a song on TV today and one line from it keeps ringing in my head:

I am waiting on you and I am peaceful!

Wow...if that's not a challenge...

Here are they words to the song by John Waller : I am Waiting.
I’m waiting
I’m waiting on You, Lord
And I am hopeful
I’m waiting on You, Lord
Though it is painful
But patiently, I will wait

I will move ahead, bold and confident
Taking every step in obedience

While I’m waiting
I will serve You
While I’m waiting
I will worship
While I’m waiting
I will not faint
I’ll be running the race
Even while I wait

I’m waiting
I’m waiting on You, Lord
And I am peaceful
I’m waiting on You, Lord
Though it’s not easy
But faithfully, I will wait
Yes, I will wait

I will serve You while I’m waiting
I will worship while I’m waiting
I will serve You while I’m waiting
I will worship while I’m waiting
I will serve You while I’m waiting
I will worship while I’m waiting on You,Lord

What a standard to live by!

QUESTION:

Is there a condition inorder to have God's blessing in/on your life?

So sweet

Every night Jason puts Blake to bed. I then go in a half hour or forty five min. later and rock Blake. Usually he is still awake and as I rock him, I smile at him, he smiles at me, he giggles, i tickle my nose with his nose, and he giggles some more...it's a sweet time that I always look forward to.

As I went to rock Blake to sleep tonight, it was the same routine...mommy smiles at Blake, Blake smiles at mommy, mommy tickles Blake's nose with her nose, and then Blake giggles. it was a sweet moment, but something followed that was even sweeter. Blake kept eye contact with me for a little longer than normal and i looked into his eyes as he grinned at me and said, "Blake, Jesus loves you. I hope you have a relationship with Jesus early on." As i said that he folded his little hands together and bowed his head and closed his eyes. He thought i was praying. I was so touched by the fact that when I said Jesus he equated that with us praying.

What a sweet moment for Blake and i to share. I do hope he knows early on in life that Jesus loves him so much...and hope i can be the one to lead him to Christ when he is old enough.

A year later

We did it! I was so worried we weren't going to be able do something I wanted to do so bad because of our busy lives and the weather. But yesterday we went and had a wonderful time. It was a little muddy and windy, but the weather ended up being nice. When we first got there Blake went on a pony ride. He did so well. Dad walked by his side and even let go of Blake so that he was riding all by himself. Mom then spotted a huge slide that she thought daddy and Blake would enjoy. Sure enough they went down the huge slide and Blake didn't cry a bit. Just across the slide was the train ride....mom took blake on that one. He did great. He did keep asking for dad, but he did wonderful. Then daddy and mommy had to have something that they both love and always talk about....a funnel cake. Blake didn't want any of it, so mommy and daddy had it all to themselves. We had a great time today.

As we were walking around the patch, I was recalling last year when we went. Blake had his helmet and was just over 6 months old. That was the day that he started to babble so much more. It was a beautiful day as well...but man how time does fly.

We were leaving the patch yesterday and daddy said, "Bye pumpkin farm, we'll see you next year" I turned to daddy and said...yep...and maybe when we come back mommy with be pregnant again! Wow how so much really does happen in just one year!

oh the fun

i am so blessed that Jason loves spending time with our son.

Not to far off...

And haven't even started to do anything about it. I can't believe that Christmas is just two and half months away. I haven't started to plan anything. I usually like to pick up some things here and there for shopping. I haven't even given much thought about what cookies to make or anything. This year there is so much up in the air for Holidays....my grandpa is very ill and jason's dad is too. It's hard to plan ahead when you don't know what is going to happen in just two and half months. I do know though, regardless of what cookies I make or what gifts I have or haven't bought, being with family is all that NEEDS to happen at Christmas.

realized

I used to think God's will was mostly a vocation or had to do with making a big decision. However, this past weekend I realized that God's will is much more than that.

I was privileged to be able to read the Bible to my grandpa who is battling cancer. As I was driving to his house, I heard on the radio 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18. I decided that verse would be the one that I would share with my grandpa later that day. As I read it to him, we discussed what each verse was saying....and then it hit me....God's will is not about being something or going somewhere all the time..it also is about what 1 Thessalonians says: Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. What a new challenge and mindset for me!

MOPS

I joined MOPS this fall and it has been a huge blessing! I recommend it to any mom who is looking for encouragement and support in being a mom, wife, friend, and child of God.

When you join MOPS you get many perks...one is a book. I started to read this book and in it were suggestions on how to invest in yourself. As a mother sometimes you feel like you do nothing for yourself cause it's always about dad and baby. Reading this book gave me some ideas of how to do things for me and helped me realize that I do already some of these things. Here are some examples:

*girls night
*gym time with childcare
*hot showers
*reading
*bubble bath
*hair appointments
*Bible study
*Kids to bed by 8
*daily devotionals
*waking up an hour before kids
*vitamins
*surfing the web
*book clubs
*pedicure and manicure

I hope as you read this post you get ideas of more things to do to invest in yourself and also help realize you already have done some of the things listed.

To invest in yourself helps you, your husband, and your child! It's not a bad thing to do, it's a good thing!

so excited

I am so excited to take Blake to the pumpkin farm this year. I grew up going to the same one every year, when I got married, Jason and I went there too. Last year for the first time Blake was able to have the same experience that I had when I was young. As October has approached, I am afraid with our busy schedule we won't find a Saturday or Sunday in which we have free and then on top of it one with good weather as well. I am crossing my fingers we could be blessed with both!

Just sayin'

Trying to gear up for winter and being indoors with Blake all day. I need to start buying new toys for him to play with to help with those long days stayin in the house. A thought crossed my mind to try and maybe research on line ideas of things to do with a 1 1/2 year old boy to keep them entertained. So any thoughts on things I can do with him this winter that would be age appropriate. PS- He doesn't sit still more than 5min.....

Simple thought

Just thinking today that sometimes spending time with your husband has to be intentional.... and when it is...it's so worth it!

two years ago tomorrow

Two years ago tomorrow will be the anniversary of when I told my class that I was pregnant and when I had a dream I was going to have a boy...via c-section. Crazy how it did come true. I love reading my old blog posts about pregnancy and looking back at Blake when he was a baby. Ahhhhhh he is so big now!

don't know what to title this

I hate hoping for something and then getting excited to suddenly have myself disappointed...is there anyway to protect yourself from something like that?

Simply Blessed

I am blessed:

* I have a loving husband
* I have a husband who is an active participant in Blake's life
* I have a handsome son
* I have a beuatiful home
* I have a husband who has a good job
* I have a supportive extended family who loves the Lord
* I have a wonderful home church
* I have friends that are non judgemental and encouraging
* I have a car and my husband has a car
* I have money to get groceries every week, to use on fun acitivities, and to buy clothes with
* I have a gym I can workout at
* I have more than I could ask for and feel overwhelmed that God choose me to be blessed!

Simon Says

Oh Blakers...he does everything I tell him to do! I love it! When he is chewing I will say, "Open your mouth!" and he opens his mouth....he is understanding so much! He loves our new house. He enjoys all the open space and just exploring right now. The other day I was in the car with my mom and she sat in the back with Blake as I was driving. I put worship music on and we were singing and worshiping and Blake decided to mimic my mom and lifted his hands to worship. Now he has done lots of things to melt my heart, but that really just made me truly melt. His little chubby hands in the air worshiping was priceless.

We have had a ton going on lately. Lots of need for God's ever present hands needing to be reached out to my family and friends right now. Waiting on God to show his blessings and faithfulness in action!

15 months

Blake just had his 15 month appointment he is the following:
In 50% weight and 30-40% height.

He is doing well with walking and learning new words...the doctor said he should be saying at least 6 words, and we are on track or even a bit above that.

He has begun to know how to throw tantrums and also has selective responding. Here is the deal: Blake can respond and do commands like : throw away garbage, shut the door, give someone something, but when we tell him don't touch, he touches something. The doctor said that he is being selective in what he is responding to. That he knows what no means, but continues to do it anyways. That means that Jason and I need to be more consistent in how we talk to Blake...when he is doing something he isn't suppose to do it, we leave it at just saying no and redirecting him. The doc told us not to have lengthy conversations with him when disciplining him because he sees he is getting attention and he will love it. If we just say no, it's not a ton of attention and conversation with him and soon he will catch on to what we are trying to teach him. We'll see....we'll try this and hopefully he will stop touching the TV!

WOW!

I don't think life has ever been as difficult and as crazy as it has been lately. Yes, our marriage struggle was hard...but that only entailed Jason and me. Now what is going on entails Jason, Blake, and extended family. There are many more people to worry about and make sure everyone is taken care of. How does that happen with situations changing so much around you and there being no consistency...I guess the Lord has to be my constant.

Easier Said than Done

i know in the Bible it says if anyone lacks wisdom just ask. i feel like i have asked for wisdom and discernment, yet i still am in the dark in what to do. i am dealing with a hard situation right now where everyday i need wisdom in what to say, what not to say, how to react, or not to react at all. i hope that my life is being lived in such a way that i will be able to hear God's voice leading me during these difficult times.

PS- I could really use some good laughter and some non stressful moments...any takers????

We women....

are emotional. I recently (about a month or so ago) was reading about being led by the Spirit. I was talking about not being a reactive person, but letting the Holy Spirit led and guide me. I today came across an article that helps me to also know of another way the Holy Spirit can lead me. As women, we are emotional beings....we can't help it, it's the most wonderful thing God has equipped us with...yepo..equipped. I believe emotions are a strength for women...however it can be a detriment when not under the control of the Lord. I read this article I am about to post (only an expert from it) and really thought that I need the Holy Spirit to control my emotions too...that's part of walking and being led by the Lord. Here it is...let me know if you agree or disagree????

If our emotions are to be sanctified, if our emotions are to be conformed to the image of Christ, then we must have a grasp on what the Bible says. If we are going to successfully cultivate our emotions for greater godliness and put to death those destructive, ungodly emotions, then we must have a handle on what the Bible says about them. A biblical theology is foundational for us if we ever hope to understand our emotions and grow spiritually. A commitment to the sufficiency of Scripture must undergird our approach. A confidence in the grace of God is a prerequisite if we are to change. Once that commitment and confidence are firmly in place, we can begin the journey with the expectation that God will teach us, prune us, and grow us.

As soon as we start this journey, however, we encounter obstacles and potential detours because there is so much erroneous teaching on the emotions. We need to navigate around the obstacles, avoiding dangerous detours, and cut a clear course when it comes to the emotions and what the Bible teaches. To think erroneously, that is, unbiblically, about the emotions is to be held captive by wrong thinking and to remain powerless to overcome wrong feelings and cultivate right feelings. To have a biblical foundation for understanding the emotions is to think rightly about them.

This does not mean that all emotions are rational. They often are not. But it does identify the fact that the emotions are responses to our perceptions, which may be right or wrong, real or imagined. “Emotions are the language of the soul. They are the cry that gives the heart a voice.”10 This is not to claim that all emotions are easily intelligible and able to be thoroughly analyzed. They often cannot. And yet, we must learn to understand this basic part of our humanity. Sam Williams rightly notes, “God gives emotions for a specific purpose. They are necessary for us properly to know and relate to and glorify God.”11

What's my deal?

I feel like I can't get enough sleep lately? I got nine hours of sleep on Wed. night, yet I felt like I needed more. Same thing today...it's only 11am and I feel like I could go back to bed!

Learning

My little one is learning so much right now. Today I was sitting in his bedroom while he was playing and my legs were stretched out. He went in his drawer and found his shoes and tried to put them on my feet. Ugh...he just melts my heart. He has found his little nose hose and has decided while eating he will just stick his finger in his nose and keep it there. I just laugh and laugh...it's too funny to correct right now. He knows commands like: shut the door, knock on the door, throw something away, get a book, ex. He loves to have all different kinds of bottles (water bottle, milk gallon, ex.) and put the tops on the correct bottle. I find him learning everyday. It's hard because he will not sit still for me to read to him, so I feel like he isn't learning. However, every week he shows me he is learning something new. I love this boy!

Crosswalk.com

I have been reading a little scripture devotional from Crosswalk.com. Today was about faith. There are some levels of faith...1st level is no faith...2nd level I seem to fall into lately... second level of faith is little faith. HEre is the excerpt from the devotional

As we see in the passage in Matthew, little faith is a worried faith, worried about tomorrow and occupied with lack instead of being occupied with God.

While people with little faith believe God cares, their focus is wrong. They are concentrating on, “What am I going to eat? What am I going to wear? How am I going to get by?”

Now, those are all legitimate things; and your Father knows you have need of those things. So rather than focusing on your lack and being worried about tomorrow, pulling tomorrow’s clouds over today’s sunshine, let your focus be on God and His sufficiency, His care, and His abundant love.

Do not live a life of little faith.

Curious

I just read about spiritual intimacy in a marriage. How do you create it besides reading and praying together? They made some good points in this article. You hold hands when you pray together, you do a devotional together that has discussion back and forth, you go out with other Christian couples,speak up when you see your spouse growing in spiritual areas...compliment him/her. You find out what God is wanting to do through your marriage, hmmm I wonder what he DOES want to do? I think Jason and I are continually on a road of being refined in our marriage. We are not ever happy with where we are at. We have come a very long way, yet still have miles and kilometers to go. What is God's ultimate plan for us? We often think sometimes it's a ministry to other marriages, or I think it's just to show people around us of God's faithfulness and blessings when we obey what he says. I don't know, but I love what the end of the article said: the greatest gift you can give your spouse is to NEVER stop growing spiritually yourself! Great advice!

Which is it?

I heard Jon from Jon and Kate Plus 8 say that "His family is his priority." I am glad to hear that however, having been through such a hard road in our marriage, I would have liked my husband to have said, " My marriage is my priority." I believe that in order for your family to be strong, first and foremost, your marriage needs to be strong. Family is important don't get me wrong, but when your marriage is falling apart like theirs is, your family needs to be what you are pouring your time and effort into.

Am I the only one here...please tell me NO!

I recently read an article about Jon and Kate (From Jon and Kate Plus 8).I must say, I am a big fan of the show. Jon had recently said that he has male and female friends and just because he's famous he isn't going to stop being friends with females. Okay, he's right, just because he's famous maybe not stop being friends with females. But HELLO...how about because you are married you stop your female friendships. Honestly, I had friends that were males in high school and college and we would go shopping together, tanning together, sporting events together, ex. However, when I got married, those "guy" friendships stopped as far as going out alone together. Now that I am married, we try and have couple friends vs. male or female friends. Am I the only one here who thinks thats way? Do you think it's okay if you are married to go out with a "guy" friend alone? Or have your husband go out with a "girl" friend alone? Seriously, what is Jon thinking?

Day filled

Today is a day filled with too many emotionally draining events. I need to workout and get a release of all these things going on, but too bad life's daily agenda won't let me. Hmmmm prayer should work better, I have time to pray while I go about my day and its many tasks.

Trying

With trying to sell our house, I am TRYING to always keep the house clean. It gets tricky with Blake walking everywhere and getting into everything.

Not the best

I don't look very becoming in this picture I just posted. It's for sure not the best picture to put on here. However, I read something today that gave me something to strive for. I often struggle with feeling pretty and now that I am a stay at home mom, I feel like I am so out of what's in for fashion too. I often do the stay at home mom deal of sweats and a t-shirt (lucky Jason). Anyways, I read something today that I loved!!!! That I feel like gives me something to pray, reflect on, and try and make a part of my daily life.

1 Peter 3:3-4
Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of INNER SELF, THE UNFADING BEAUTY OF A GENTLE AND QUIET SPIRIT, WHICH IS OF GREAT WORTH IN GOD'S SIGHT.

Reactionary

I am such a reactionary person. When something happens that I agree or disagree with, I am quick to react. As a mother and wife, I don't want to be quick to react to my frustration or my impatience. I was recently reminded of that verse in Galatians where it talks about being controlled by the spirit and not by your sinful nature and how the two are at war with one another. I decided to look on Biblegateway (which I am really into lately) and read this in the commentary and it really hit home and gave me something to strive for : Life by the Spirit involves active obedience to the direction of the Spirit (v. 16), constant warfare against the desires of the sinful nature by the power of the Spirit (v. 17) and complete submission to the control of the Spirit (v. 18). Such a life will be an experience of freedom from the control of the sinful nature and the control of the law.

It seems simple doesn't it. I want Blake to be able to see a gentle, loving, patient Christian mother who is led by the Spirit. At times when I wanna scream, hide, or am about to loose my patience I want to be conscious of allowing the Spirit to control those emotions and thoughts and help me to have a positive reaction towards those feelings. It even can be applied to people I feel have wronged me or have hurt me. To love them, and respect them, and go to them gently and being the led by the Spirit will help me react postively in those situations. I don't want to be led by my sinful nature but the Spirit and in return hopefully too can exhibit the Fruits of the Spirit to those around me as well. The benefits of living by the Spirit far out way living by my sinful nature! Lord give me the grace and mercy to do so!!!

That's my boy!

I went to Jewel on Saturday to get my medicine. Jewel is our local grocery store that has a pharmacy attached to it. While I was waiting for the lady to fill my prescription, I was holding Blake in my arms. Blake loves to discover things and is always touching and grabbing anything around him. As I was watching the pharmacist fill my prescription, Blake decides to press buttons on the Card Swiper machine. I gentle pulled back Blake's hands and said, "Blake, we don't touch those buttons." The pharmacists was so sweet, she said don't worry, he can't do any harm by pressing those buttons, he is okay, really!. So I felt better that she had said that. She quickly ended my order and began to ring me up, and the front machine wasn't work. She said, that's odd, hmmm wonder why this isn't working. She decided to shut that machine down and try another machine. The other cash register she tried wasn't working either. She was perplexed and I could see she was scrambling, I asked her if Blake touched buttons to ruin the cash regisiter and she said, Oh no, don't worry he didn't. I told her I will come back in an hour and pick up my meds and I was so sorry if he had done anything to mess the cash register up.

Sunday, Jason went to the dr. and he had to get medicine for his infections. He goes to Jewel and tells the pharmisist his name. She says, "Oh I think your wife and son were in here yesterday picking up medicine. Do you wanna hear a funny story" Jason of course said yes. She procceds to tell him that while we were in the store Blake touched some buttons and shut off ALL the cash regisiters in teh entire store. Jason felt awful, but she assured him that she said it was okay to touch the buttons. She then said, "Your son is desitined to do great things!"

I would have to say that we both felt bad that Blake had messed up all the registers in teh store, but I do have to say that Jason and I totally agree with the pharmisist, "BLAKE IS DESTINED TO DO GREAT THINGS!"

wouldn't you know

So we are officially putting our house on the market this week. The Realtor comes tomorrow to take pictures and then we are done. We have had to paint, reorganize, clean everything out, get a storage space for all our wonderful stuff, and rearrange. I am looking forward to having the house on the market again, but at the same time am dreading keeping it spic and span for showings. It's not the easiest to do with a little one year old. And wouldn't you know that Jason, me, and Blake have been sick. What great timing! I am praying that we all feel better soon, and that having it on the market will not be too much of an inconvenience. We aren't too much in a hurry to sell and move, but it would be a blessing if it happened fast. I am just glad that my confidence and hope is in God's plan for us and where he would like us to live.

The one I lived with

Ahhhh I was blessed to be able to go to MO to visit my college roommate. I went down Thursday thru Sunday. The trip went by way too fast. I kept thinking the whole time that this might be the last time in a long time that we will be able to see one another. Kimberly is expecting her first children in just two months. Yepo, she has been blessed with twins! It's been a tough road, but God has chosen to bless her and Kyle with two babies. When I first pulled up to her house this weekend, I couldn't help but tear up. I prayed for her and those babies and to see God's faithfulness stand right before me was amazing. Her little round belly filled with two lives was so beautiful. We had such a wonderful time together. We didn't go shopping much, or we weren't out and about much, but we relaxed together at her house. We watched foodnetwork, real housewives, ellen, and just talked and talked and talked. She was an amazing hostess. She had my favorite candies, magazines, and snacks on the bed for me when I walked into the room I was staying in. Her home was so cozy and warm. I felt so relaxed when I was there. I couldn't help thinking while I was there that our tradition of seeing one another once a year will probably be broken next year. I do know though without a doubt that we will continue to talk almost everyday. I am blessed to have her as a friend, and even more blessed to be able to spend so much time with her this past weekend and to be able to go to the ultrasound and have seen the babies. I am so glad that God chose to bring her into my life, and will be forever grateful for that.


I hope to post some pictures when I get them from her, she is a bit busy resting being pregnant with two little ones!

One Year

My little Blake turns a year old tomorrow.

Oh dear, as I got ready to go into the operating room, I had a mix of emotions. I was so relieved when Jason was by my side as the procedure began. About 10min into the procedure, we heard..."It's a boy!" Ahhhh the joy and excitement I had. The anxiousness for me to meet eyes with my child for the first time! I can't even begin to explain the firs time I saw Blake. I just kept thinking, wow this was in me 10min ago so safe in my belly, and now it's out in this world, I have such a big job to raise and protect this child. He was beautiful. Boys can't be beautiful, but he really was! His eyes, head, fingers, toes, little belly, all was just beautiful.

Off to the recovery room as Jason and I were able to be alone with Blake. I was out of it, but did know that Blake was by my side. I nursed and held him and kissed the little boy. The tiny features and little lips were so precious.

Soon we were in the room and had visitors pounding on the door to see their nephew/grandson. The love that Blake received in his first few months of life was so heart touching. Friends and family loved on him in a way that was so overwhelming.

The hospital stay was so fun! Amongst all the setbacks with my recovery, Blake had so many visitors, so many friends and family to keep mommy company too. Bethany stayed one night to help out. We watched hairspray and stayed up and talked for several hours. At 2am I heard a baby screaming and told Bethany, ummm I think that one is mine. She replied...yeah right, all babies sound the same. Sure enough, in wheels Blake...hungry little guy he was!

My parents came by one time while in the hospital and said, "Hi we're are here to babysit Blake, you and Jason go on a date." That we did, we ordered room service and went across the hall to a little place with table and chairs and had our first date as new parents and left Blake with his first babysitter.

As far as the first year of his life, it has had it's challenges. With my embolisms, and frequents visits to the doctor and ER, and then Blake with his helmet, tongue being clipped, the issue with his lip, and ultra sound of kidneys it was hard...it was tiring, and it was scarey.

Along with the challenges, came many joys. The first time he opened his eyes, the first time he cried, the first time he cooed, the first time he laughed, smiled, crawled, walked, talked, were inexpressible. I remember so well the first time we heard Blake talk when he was around 6 months old. He said bbbbbbbbobbobobobob and his little cheeks moved up and down and we just got a kick out of it. OH man the first time he pulled down the toy that hung from the car seat handle was on the way to church. We thought it was such a big milestone for Blake. Ahhh the first time I fed him food was so funny! He smacked his little lips. I can't forget the first time he clapped his hands in church because everyone else around him was clapping. He has become a person, someone who loves his sweets: french toast, nutrigrain bars, and his snacks: goldfish, crackers, cheese, cheerios. Last week his big thing was eating mommy and daddy's pudding. I am so glad that Blake was given to us by the Lord. I love this little boy and am pround to call him my son. I pray that I can be the mom that he needs and am never too tired to teach and play with him.

We went to the dr. today and got his stats...he is 45th percentile for weight, 35th for height, and 70th for head. He was 29 1/4 inches, and 21.9 pounds. Ahhh the little one is so big now! The doctor said that by the time he is 15 months old he should be saying 5 words at least....I am so glad we are just about there, we need one more word. I do believe that children learn tons through playing, but I also believe that learning has to be intentional as well. We were told today that at 15months to start with doing eyes, ears, nose, mouth, and animal sounds. Also at 15 months that Blake can start to use a spoon and fork much more easily

The first year of his life is over, I hope Blake had fun and has felt his love from his mommy and daddy.

A year ago

A year ago tomorrow I ended teaching and became a full time stay at home mom. It has had its challenges and many rewards. I am grateful to no end that my husband works his tail off to allow me to stay at home and be Blake's teacher, mom, and friend. I can't imagine having to leave my precious boy for 8 hours a day and then coming home and spending time with him. I miss teaching a ton! I love being a mom a ton! I am so glad that I am able to get together with teacher friends almost once a week. I have started to help out with Junior high at church so I can get my kid fix in and see some former students. This is a wonderful time in my life to be able to invest in my child as my fulltime job. Teaching will come back some day, but until then this other full time job is a joy!

Simple Confession

I have a simple confession to make. I making it to clear my mind and from this point on to do something about it.

Lately, I have not been into the worship music at church. I feel as though it's not my style of music and have been totally checked out. I realize that is my issue. I also feel like I am too tired to worship and that I have not become a participant anymore.

I have prayed about it, and realize that maybe I am ashamed to worship God. But why would I be? I have realized that maybe I need to get my heart right and ready before I enter worship service so I am prepared to enter into a time of praise to the Lord. In saying that, I am grateful God has gently taught me to worship whether or not the music is my style and to remember to get ready to enter worship before I step foot into church. If I can worship freely in my home, then I should be able to worship freely with a body of believers.

And he's....

Crawling. Yep, I didn't think Blake would crawl ever. Sure I thought when he was a bit older, but he started to crawl a bit yesterday. 3 weeks shy of 1 years old and he is crawling. I am so excited! Yes..it's much harder to keep track of him and I am ALWAYS on my toes telling him he can't bite wires, can't put his fingers in the socket, can't touch the lamp, but as Jason says, " I would much rather have an active child than one who doesn't do much." It has become much harder to clean, cook, and do laundry. I have to watch him at all times, but I am sure this is just a phase. He is getting more and more of a personality. He knows when he isn't suppose to touch something, he will look at me and touch it. Ugh..it's quite fun here...never a dull moment. When I tickle his feet, legs, or hands, and stop, he raises his other hand or foot to be tickled. It is really cute. He has tried to feed himself with a spoon..WHAT a MESS! I have to be more at ease about how messy he is when he eats. I give up on trying to ALWAYS have a clean floor by his eating space. He isn't napping much either. A total of an hour and half a day. I am trying all sorts of things out to see how he will transition to one nap. He takes a morning nap no prob...it's the afternoon ones he won't nap for. But I feel like he needs that morning nap. I have tried putting him down at 1:00 and he naps an hour that's it. Bedtime is still 8:00 pm. I am thinking about putting him down at 7:45 instead. I don't know. Any idea of naps and transitioning at all?